Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • My dog sets an impossible bar for how I should greet my wife when she comes home.
  • Having a loose stool means two completely different things depending on if you are a nurse or a bartender.
  • Spice up your work day by drinking your coffee from a flask.
  • I bring a very “are you going to eat your pickle” vibe to lunch meetings.
  • Life is like a helicopter. I don’t know how to operate a helicopter.
  • Everyone’s a gangster until the grocery store switches their aisles around.