Commentary:
Feeling celestial with my own personal light show and eclipses every time I stand up too quickly! 🌌🤯✨
138 Funny sometimes quotes
Sometimes I want to socialise, but I don’t want to talk. I just want to be around, like a cat.
Commentary:
Purr-fectly feeling this! 🐱🤫 Just let me silently judge from the corner. 🛋️😸
Sometimes, when I get emotionally attached to a show, I don’t watch the last episode so it doesn’t end for me.
Commentary:
Refusing to say goodbye like a pro, keeping those fictional friends around indefinitely 📺😭🍿
I think I could actually generate electricity with how irritated I get sometimes.
Commentary:
Sounds like you need a wind turbine for your eye rolls and a solar panel for your sighs! 😂⚡️😄
Sometimes I do random acts of kindness, like keeping my mouth shut, for example.
Commentary:
That's the kind of kindness that deserves a standing ovation! 👏🤐😄
Sometimes you’re eating a salad, and it feels like it’s never going to end.
Commentary:
When your salad feels like it's auditioning for the role of Neverending Gobstopper. 🥗😂
Sometimes I think the subway rat is doing better than me. He has a routine, a social circle, and knows where to find the best pizza.
Commentary:
Why do I feel like that rat has its life more together than I do? 🍕🐀🏆
My diet plan is sometimes, when I’m eating chips, I drop some on the floor, and I don’t eat those ones.
Commentary:
Sounds like a solid calorie reduction strategy! Now where can I get these self-dropping chips? 😂🍟🧹
Everything happens for a reason. Sometimes the reason is you’re stupid and you make bad decisions.
Commentary:
When life gives you lemons, double-check the instructions before you start a lemonade stand! 🍋🤔🙃
Sometimes I watch people do their jobs, and I’m like, damn, you might benefit from a little imposter syndrome, actually.
Commentary:
Taking notes for the next office meeting: 1) Develop imposter syndrome, 2) Teach a masterclass on "How Not to Do Your Job" 😂📋💼