My hobbies include saying, “I’m so tired,” and then staying up for three more hours doing nothing.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has copied:

Outlook just asked me if I’m “enjoying” Microsoft Outlook. As if it’s not the Torment Portal.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has bookmarked:

Wearing expensive perfume to work feels like such a waste. This should be under someone’s full body weight, not in a corporate setting.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has bookmarked:

I hate that moment when you are tired and sleepy but as soon as you go to bed your body is like “just kidding.”

Someone from 🇱🇧 has shared:

‘Blinded by the Light’ is really just a song about turning the bathroom light on in the middle of the night.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has downloaded:

Wife asked if I could stop singing Wonderwall. I said maybe…

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People who lie all the time really think that we don’t know.

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Gutted to report that spending a day offline, touching grass with my friends, was phenomenal for my mental health.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has copied:

If you’re out shopping today, be nice to retail workers. It’s not their fault you waited until Marys waters broke before you started your shopping.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has bookmarked:

I have entirely too many new bruises for someone who isn’t getting laid.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has bookmarked:

Me going to work because I’m too honest to scam people, too shy to be an influencer, too good for a sugar daddy, and too dumb for crypto.