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Commentary:
"Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes and secretly plotting her takeover 😏💁‍♀️ Who said women don't have superpowers? 💪👀"

every, eyes, gender, gender roles, great, great man, humor, man, relationship, roles, rolling, rolling eyes, sarcasm, woman

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

If you catch me smiling at you, chances are I am plotting my revenge.

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2 months ago

am, catch, chances, humor, i, me, mischief, plotting, revenge, sarcasm, smiling, wit
Yes, I am super annoying, but don’t worry, it’s just permanent.

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3 months ago

am, annoying, attitude, humor, i, just, permanence, personality, self-awareness, super, worry, yes
Establish dominance by asking your dentist if he’s flossing everyday.

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2 months ago

asking, assertiveness, care, dental, dental care, dentist, dominance, everyday, flossing, humor
I never knew how fast I could write until the teacher said pencils down.

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2 months ago

competition, fast, humor, i, never, pencils, pressure, school, teacher, writing
As everyone was arguing about politics, no one saw me leave with the cake.

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2 months ago

arguing, cake, distraction, everyone, humor, leave, leaving, me, party, politics, saw
Most of my job is making things idiot proof, but they keep making better idiots.

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2 months ago

better, frustration, humor, idiot, idiots, irony, job, keep, making, proof, things, workplace

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

90 shares on X this month:

Well, I’ve been depressed and poor, but sure, we’ll call it intermittent fasting.

64 shares on Slack this month:

If a ham is allowed to spiral then so am I.

14 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Sometimes I use big words I don’t always fully understand, in an effort to make myself sound more photosynthesis.

16 shares on WeChat this month:

My biggest motivation for getting out of bed in the morning is knowing that I will eventually be able to get back in the bed.

16 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I wish religion made people nicer to each other.

63 shares on WhatsApp this month:

The worst part about being in your 40s is the 10 years of listening to people say, “Wait till you’re 50.”

47 shares on Telegram this month:

I wish pets lived longer, and life wasn’t so expensive, and cake didn’t make you fat, and people weren’t twats.

53 shares on Slack this month:

Trying to decide what to burn for dinner, so I can order pizza.

64 shares on Facebook this month:

Every single morning, I have to get out of bed and do things, and it’s bullshit.

99 shares on Messenger this month:

I deleted Google when I met you because the search was over.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇨 has shared:

When I was a kid, we weren’t allowed to use our phones in school. Mainly because the cords wouldn’t reach.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has downloaded:

I always take two stairs at a time, that way if I fall, it’s only half the distance.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has copied:

No one has ever believed in me more than this waitress, who brought me buffalo wings and a single wet nap.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has bookmarked:

Sometimes, fasting from people is also important.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has downloaded:

I wish I loved anything as much as people love to say they are “thrilled” on LinkedIn.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has viewed:

If you’re reading this, drink some water. You’re not a cactus.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has shared:

Asian parents give you unmoanable names so you can focus on your studies.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has copied:

Your honor, if it pleases the court, I brought homemade brownies for everyone.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has viewed:

Spice up your meltdown through interpretive dance.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has viewed:

Best threesome: me, my bed and my pillow.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

Just did my own taxes, I should be in jail by Friday.

Seen just now on Reddit:

One minute you’re young and fun, the next you’re excited about a new vacuum cleaner.

Trending via WhatsApp:

There will be people in your life that say you have too many books. Those are not your people.

Trending via Telegram:

I tried to embrace my flaws. They filed a restraining order.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

My body feels like it’s aging in dog years.

Going viral on Twitch:

I hate it when I check my transactions history, and everything adds up like damn, so no one stole from me.

Making waves on Telegram:

If you’re riding in my car, that little middle piece is for my elbow — not yours.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Good morning, dickhead, your little ray of sarcastic sunshine has arrived.

Going viral on Twitch:

My neighbors were yelling so loud at their kids to clean up their room that out of fear even I started cleaning my room.

Just landed via Reddit:

At what age do people actually meet up to play bingo? I’m ready.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

If you catch me smiling at you, chances are I am plotting my revenge.

Yes, I am super annoying, but don’t worry, it’s just permanent.

Establish dominance by asking your dentist if he’s flossing everyday.

I never knew how fast I could write until the teacher said pencils down.

As everyone was arguing about politics, no one saw me leave with the cake.

Most of my job is making things idiot proof, but they keep making better idiots.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨