Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇩 has shared:

Dear people who talk on speakerphone out in public. Everyone around you hates you.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has shared:

Ever since I was a little kid I always knew I wanted to struggle to survive.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has viewed:

Going “Omgg, that’s crazy,” every time my coworkers talk until it’s time to go home.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has downloaded:

Your girlfriend needs two hours to get ready. But if you don’t have your shoes on when she’s ready, you’re the problem.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has copied:

One day you’re young and fun, and the next you’re saying, “I wonder how old this tree is.”

Someone from 🇫🇲 has viewed:

I’ve jogged with my jogging pants about as often as I’ve rolled through the kitchen with kitchen roll.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has bookmarked:

I am so lucky that I can’t tell the difference between a heartfelt compliment and sarcastic disdain. Life is much easier when you’re dumb.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has copied:

I can’t wait to go to bed, get terrible sleep, and wake up exhausted with a sore back.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has bookmarked:

Out of sheer boredom, I opened the front door and rang the doorbell. I was so happy.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has copied:

No, I’m not depressed. I’m sure there’s just something wrong with the planets or stars or something.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

244 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,513

Funny Quotes Topics

17,581

Funny Quotes Images

15,513

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,681

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Instagram:

You’ll never realize how crazy you really are until you fall in love.

Going viral on Instagram:

I don’t have any generational wealth but I did inherit a great spaghetti sauce recipe.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

Always keep a dog eared book on your nightstand so that people think you know how to read.

Shared recently on WeChat:

The sexual tension between me and vanishing without context is insane.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

Forgot how fun it is to post IG stories. I feel like a female filmmaker.

Just shared via Discord:

Babe, would it kill you to meow back?

Going viral on Discord:

I need something good to watch while I’m on my phone.

Making waves on Twitch:

Welcome to Twitter: yeah, none of us can sleep either.

Seen just now on Instagram:

Some people can start a task and then just finish it instead of trying to do a hundred things at once, like a squirrel on crack.

Making waves on Facebook:

Keep scrolling, I’ve got nothing.

Democracy is a fine thing. The bad thing is that the stupid people are allowed to take part.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Democracy: Letting everyone have a say, even those who struggle to find their own shoes 😜🗳️ #DemocracyDilemma"

bad, democracy, fine, humor, irony, opinion, participation, people, politics, stupid, take, thing

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Liberté. Egalité. Second Coffeé.

0

2 months ago

caffeine, coffee, égalité, humor, liberté, play, play on words, second, words
Movie date at my house, but we use pirated sites and spend all night closing pop-ups.

0

2 months ago

closing, date, entertainment, home, house, humor, internet, movie, movie date, night, pirated, pirated site, pop-up, site, sites, spend, streaming, technology
The best weight you’ll ever lose is the weight of other people’s opinions.

0

1 month ago

best, confidence, ever, humor, lose, loss, motivation, opinion, opinions, self, self-confidence, weight, weight loss, wisdom
364 days until Christmas, and people already have decorations up. Unbelievable.

0

2 weeks ago

Christmas, countdown, days, decoration, decorations, holiday, humor, impatience, people
There are too many movies about vampire hunters and not enough about vampire gatherers.

0

2 months ago

comedy, entertainment, gatherer, humor, hunter, movie, satire, too, vampire
I don’t like violence, but I don’t mind if I get hit by luck.

0

2 months ago

chance, conflict, humor, irony, luck, mind, violence

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

70 shares on Threads this month:

8 year gap on resume that just says “karate”.

100 shares on Reddit this month:

When my nudes go to the cloud, I always hope God is impressed.

81 shares on Threads this month:

Ghost stories sound way scarier with an English accent.

24 shares on Instagram this month:

That odd feeling when your lunch break is over and you still have to work for another 30 years.

45 shares on WeChat this month:

I’m always looking for new and exciting ways to give up.

25 shares on Facebook this month:

Liking a song isn’t enough, I need to be able to call the artist and tell them they did a great job.

50 shares on Telegram this month:

I’m a little too self-aware to enjoy life, and a little too delusional to give up.

15 shares on LinkedIn this month:

That’s me in the corner, that’s me in the spotlight, begging for my cat’s attention.

58 shares on Instagram this month:

Having children is a pyramid scheme.

47 shares on Twitch this month:

I have no use for mean people. I’ll walk right past you like you’re furniture.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇱 has downloaded:

Shouldn’t it have been called the ‘not answering machine’?

Someone from 🇳🇵 has copied:

Told my boss I was going to the bathroom but didn’t say which one. Now I’m at home.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has copied:

Netflix & by yourself.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has copied:

At the club asking for Ibuprofen.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has viewed:

Messed up and threw a surprise party for my minimalist friend. Now 25 of us are hiding behind the granite orb.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has downloaded:

Started from the bottom, now we a little bit above the bottom.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has bookmarked:

I want time to watch more films, but I also want time to read more books, but I also want time to look at more nothing.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has viewed:

I forgot to take my meds so I’m looking forward to joining the squirrels in the tree to talk politics.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has bookmarked:

I get so embarrassed for no reason after posting on social media, like, why am I showing my life?

Someone from 🇫🇷 has viewed:

Why is everyone’s main goal to get married and have kids? Like, don’t you guys want to do drugs in foreign countries?

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on X:

Twitter is for people who tried suffering in silence and realized it wasn’t for them.

Broadcasted on Reddit:

I will play my favorite song until the artist comes out of my phone to ask for water.

Making waves on Snapchat:

I’m at a point in life where I’m just at a point.

Spotted on YouTube:

Sorry I’m late. I was in the car waiting for my song to end.

Live now on WeChat:

It’s so beautiful when two real perverts find each other.

Shared recently on Discord:

Ever since I was young, I wanted to check my email for a verification code.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

I have a very particular set of useless skills.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Schedule your appointment early in the month before your dentist starts fretting about their next boat payment.

Going bananas on Messenger:

The advantage of being an identical twin: you only need one gym contract.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

My favorite yoga pose is reaching for the remote control on the far end of the table without falling off the couch.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Democracy is a fine thing. The bad thing is that the stupid people are allowed to take part.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Liberté. Egalité. Second Coffeé.

Movie date at my house, but we use pirated sites and spend all night closing pop-ups.

The best weight you’ll ever lose is the weight of other people’s opinions.

364 days until Christmas, and people already have decorations up. Unbelievable.

There are too many movies about vampire hunters and not enough about vampire gatherers.

I don’t like violence, but I don’t mind if I get hit by luck.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨