Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇭 has shared:

Celebrating President’s Day by not doing anything I promised I would.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has shared:

I don’t want to brag but I walked into a room and remembered why I walked in.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has shared:

Hey, boy, are you the worst-case scenario? Because you’re all I think about.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has bookmarked:

Autumn at last. Sitting on the sofa all day with a blanket and tea and watching movies. Just like in summer, but with a blanket and tea.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has viewed:

The only joke my mom ever made was me.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has bookmarked:

Village life is when you send two kids out to play and six kids come back hungry.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has downloaded:

It’s kinda weird that in order to go to sleep you have to pretend like you are already sleeping.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has viewed:

Finding a person to make eye contact with during stupid meetings is essential to survival in the workplace.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has bookmarked:

How would someone cancel an appointment at a sperm bank? Do you just call them and say you can’t come?

Someone from 🇫🇮 has viewed:

That moment when you finish watching a TV series and you don’t know what to do with your life any more.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

799 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,961

Funny Quotes Topics

13,930

Funny Quotes Images

10,961

54 minutes ago

3,419

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Discord:

I used to think adulthood was one crisis after another. I was wrong. Multiple crises. Concurrently. All at once. All the time. Forever.

Trending via Telegram:

When people tell me “you’re going to regret that in the morning”, I sleep until noon because I am a problem solver.

Shared recently on Reddit:

Christmas is the season of giving, and I’m giving up for good.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

You can just make up words and if you say them in a Scottish accent, people will think they’re real: Looka the wee janglers on that tary bibbit.

Shared recently on WeChat:

‘I love reading!’ says the woman who loves owning books.

Live now on Instagram:

I miss when there were so many episodes of every show that they all eventually did one where it was hot, and the air conditioning went out.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Hi, I’m a social media user, you might know me from such hits as “I’m leaving this stupid place” and “I’m back everybody.”

Reported on Snapchat:

You want me to pay attention to the details? The thing the devil is in?

Trending via Threads:

Imagine you blocked me, and I crawled out from under your couch to ask why.

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

Sometimes when I get negative feedback I’m like “Hey, only I get to talk to myself that way”.

Home » Funny Politics Quotes

57 Funny politics quotes

Funny politics quotes add a light-hearted twist to the often serious world of government and power! 🗳️😂 Whether you’re poking fun at politicians or finding humor in policy mishaps, these quotes offer a fresh, witty perspective on the political landscape. Get ready for a laugh with a dash of satire! 😄🎉

New funny politics quotes 👇

6 days ago
Share →: I remember when “disinformation” used to be called “lies.”

Commentary:
Ah, the good ol' days when it was just Pinocchio's resume getting updated! 😂🤥📜
2 weeks ago
Share →: You should just baseline mistrust every single politician at every level until they prove themselves worthy of liking.

Commentary:
"Trusting a politician is like trusting a cat with a laser pointer — proceed with caution! 🐱🔦😆"
2 weeks ago
Share →: When I retire, I’m going to run for office.

Commentary:
"When I retire, my biggest campaign promise is to never set an alarm clock again! 🕰️😴 #VoteForSleep"
1 month ago
Share →: Hate all political parties and you’ll never be disappointed.

Commentary:
"Finally a political strategy I can get behind! 🤔🗳️ Zero expectations, zero disappointments! 😂"
1 month ago
Share →: I wish more modern politics were about trying to stop the fulfillment of an ancient prophecy.

Commentary:
"Honestly, I'm ready for politicians to say, 'The oracle has spoken!' instead of 'The polls have spoken.' 🧙‍♂️🔮🤣"
2 months ago
Share →: I’m no expert, but I don’t think the United Kingdom is very united.

Commentary:
"Maybe they should rename it the 'Somewhat United Kingdom'? 😅🤔 #BrexitBanter"
2 months ago
Share →: If you voted for someone because “he’s not a politician”, then I hope your next colonoscopy is done by a plumber.

Commentary:
"Guess I'll be calling a pastry chef for my next root canal! 🍰🦷😂"
2 months ago
Share →: When I become president, any public holiday that falls on a Thursday automatically extends to Friday.

Commentary:
Looks like when I’m president, Thursdays are getting a promotion! 🗳️🎉 Who needs a weekend when you can have a double day off? 😎🇺🇸 Let’s make “Thursday extensions” the new national policy—because everyone deserves a little extra weekend magic! ✨🛌
2 months ago
Share →: Politicians and diapers must be changed often, and for the same reason.

Commentary:
"Ah, the undeniable truth about politicians and diapers – they both need changing frequently because they're full of *bleep*! 💩😂 Let's hope one of them doesn't end up in the laundry by mistake! 👖✨"
3 months ago
Share →: Elect a clown, expect a circus.

Commentary:
"When you choose a clown to lead the show 🤡🎪, don't be surprised when the whole town turns into a circus! 🎉 Just make sure you bring plenty of popcorn and maybe a lion tamer! 🦁🍿#CircusLeadership"

For even more funny politics quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny politics quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

799 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,961

Funny Quotes Topics

13,930

Funny Quotes Images

10,961

54 minutes ago

3,419

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇳 has bookmarked:

My dog sighs a lot for someone who doesn’t pay any bills.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has downloaded:

The only difference between hungry and horny is where you insert the cucumber.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has viewed:

Instead of renting an apartment, I’m going to save up for a lighthouse and go insane in it.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has shared:

What’s a good career for people with no motivation or talent?

Someone from 🇮🇩 has copied:

I signed up to the gym a few months ago and still don’t see any results. I’ll go by there this weekend and ask what’s going on.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has copied:

Church should be less preachy and more eat-y.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has copied:

“AI is coming for your jobs!” I’d like to see AI get absolutely no work done and then throw their coworker under the bus as soon as their boss asks about it.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has bookmarked:

People have ex girlfriends, I have ex crushes.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has viewed:

Wine shopping is 10% grape variety and 90% “ooohh, this one has a pretty label.”

Someone from 🇱🇰 has copied:

The way men eat when they’re single is nothing short of dehumanizing.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via X:

I want my children to have all the things I couldn’t afford. Then I want to move in with them.

Trending via Reddit:

I dreamt this night that I had died and when I woke up, a piece of me was actually already stiff.

Trending via Instagram:

Humming & dancing while I plop my meds into my weekly pill counter like the happy little nutcase I am.

Just landed via Messenger:

It always takes me an hour to get ready. 45 minutes for doing nothing and 15 hectic minutes for the rest.

Spotted on Reddit:

It’s not my job to police the internet, but I just saw someone post a recipe for cauliflower cookies and reported them for harmful content.

Going viral on Discord:

I love when men go on diets they will be like “let me go for the healthy option”: the buffalo chicken quesadilla.

Shared recently on Discord:

Every laptop should have a “cat” button that disables the keyboard so they can nap.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

It’s hard to believe that this long, crazy election will finally be over in a few months.

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

I’m going to be real with you. My dinners lately are just sort of me throwing things into a pot like a witch in a cartoon.

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

I don’t have time for anything that doesn’t set my soul on fire.

Share Wordgag 🙏

© 2025. All fights retarded. 🤪

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴