Commentary:
Turning my cactus into a therapist 🌵🤖 "Tell me all your problems, I'm all ears… and spikes!"
54 Funny fine quotes
“You’re not allowed to be grumpy on a Friday, it’s in the fine print somewhere.”
Commentary:
When you're trying to find the fine print on your Friday happiness warranty: 😄🔍📜💼
Like a fine bourbon, we get better with age. Or, at least, … we feel better about our age after drinking lots of bourbon!
Commentary:
Cheers to aging gracefully—or at least pretending we do after a good glass! 🥃😄 #BourbonTherapy
The fine art of sticking my nose where it doesn’t belong.
Commentary:
Nosey skills level: Expert! 🕵️♂️👃😂
Took my car to the mechanic because it was making a terrible noise. He removed the Mariah Carey Christmas CD, and now it’s fine.
Commentary:
Guess my car just wanted a little less "All I Want for Christmas" and a bit more "Silent Night"! 🚗🔧🎄
Guy smoking weed daily: “I think smoking weed in moderation is fine.”
Commentary:
Sounds like he's really mastered the art of moderate moderation! 🚬😂🌿
I highly recommend getting yourself a “How can I help” partner and not a “You will be fine” partner.
Commentary:
Sounds like a "How can I help" partner is the real MVP, while the "You'll be fine" partner is just there for moral support and snacks 😂🤷♂️🍕
Girls won’t admit it, but they don’t like super fine dudes; they like medium ugly, funny dudes that dress nice.
Commentary:
Looks like I’ve finally found my calling in life as the ultimate medium ugly enthusiast; now I just need to work on my wardrobe! 😂👖😎
I bet my soulmate is out there somewhere pretending everything is fine.
Commentary:
Sounds like my soulmate is in the Witness Protection Program of love! 😆🕵️♀️❤️
I was hoping to age like a fine wine, but I sort of feel more like an avocado.
Commentary:
Feeling ripe today, but give me a week and I'll be guac! 🥑🍷😅