Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇪 has bookmarked:

I’ve been locked out of Tinder because of “unusual activity”. I must’ve got a match.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has copied:

So rude to come up with solutions to my excuses.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has downloaded:

Every morning when that damn alarm clock goes off, I just feel it so much: A million-dollar inheritance suits me much better than an office job.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has viewed:

My friends wife threatened to leave him over his Star Wars collectibles and I was like “divorce is strong in this one”.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has shared:

It’s never too early to be sad about having to work the next day.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has viewed:

Ever since I was a little girl, I knew I wanted to annoy the shit out of a beautiful man for the rest of my life.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has downloaded:

I kind of miss when people stood 6 feet away.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has shared:

I always wait 3 minutes after each post for the applause to die down.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has shared:

Quitting my job to pursue my true passion: not having a job.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has viewed:

Just rolled a joint. Not to get high or anything. It was just my ankle.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

[monthly_post_count]

Funny Quotes Total

14,548

Funny Quotes Topics

16,780

Funny Quotes Images

14,548

Nov 27, 2025

3,931

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on X:

Are French bulldogs actually French? They seem kinda Puerto Rican.

Spotted on Messenger:

If the only person you’re competing with is yourself, how could you lose?

Broadcasted on Instagram:

I don’t hate you, I just don’t want to see you alive.

Breaking via Slack:

Babe, are you OK? You’ve barely fulfilled the prophecy.

Just shared via YouTube:

Who needs therapy when you can gaslight yourself into thinking that everything is fine?

Seen just now on Snapchat:

I bet my soulmate is out there somewhere pretending everything is fine.

Live now on Messenger:

I’m upset that my parents never got rich enough for me to become a socialist.

Just landed via Slack:

Some people are like sunglasses: your day just becomes so much brighter when you accidentally drop them off the side of the boat.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

My step counter doesn’t judge. For him, steps to the fridge are just as valuable as a walk.

Spotted on Twitch:

I swear people go to Starbucks and just say random words. “Lemme get a grande iced mocha no foam quad soy hexagon vortex hypothesis with steamed ice”.

Every app is a dating app if you are creepy enough.

3 weeks ago

Every app is a dating app if you are creepy enough.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Ah, the magic power of creepiness! With the right level of unsettling behavior, even your calculator app could become a potential matchmaker. 📱😏 Who needs Tinder when you've got the uncanny ability to turn any app into a dating platform? Just don't forget to update your 'flirting algorithm'! 😉 #CreepyAppsUnite"

app, creepy, dating, humor, interaction, relationship, social, social interaction, technology

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

[monthly_post_count]

Funny Quotes Total

14,548

Funny Quotes Topics

16,780

Funny Quotes Images

14,548

Nov 27, 2025

3,761

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇱 has copied:

I’m the person who requested weather reporters stand in the storms. I have no concept of wind or rain and love seeing needless suffering.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has viewed:

I’m at that point in my life where if a car hit me, I’d probably say thank you to the kind stranger.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has downloaded:

Maybe Rome was built in a day. I wasn’t there.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has bookmarked:

So far, no one has seriously tried to bribe me, which is a shame because I am extremely corrupt. Maybe I need a position with more power.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has viewed:

Cashier: Did you find everything? Me: Did you hide something?

Someone from 🇺🇾 has copied:

My summer body has been pending for about ten years.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has copied:

Notifications are a reminder that you exist.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has viewed:

Pretty cool that we all come together on Christmas and celebrate the birth of Santa.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has bookmarked:

Anybody else not stopped farting this evening? Asking for a friend.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has downloaded:

My bank account may not be full but my sink, laundry basket and arteries sure are.

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Slack:

DUI stands for: don’t Uber, I got this.

Spreading quickly via Discord:

One thing I miss about the pandemic is getting to rip my mask off like I just botched a surgery.

Going viral on Facebook:

I bet aliens lock their door when they go past earth.

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

I like online shopping and putting everything I want in a cart, then checking my subtotal and laughing and closing the tab.

Going viral on YouTube:

Can I come over and shed hair everywhere?

Trending via X:

I’m only an introvert until I meet people worth extroverting with.

Live now on YouTube:

Welcome to downtown where the crosswalk signals are merely suggestions and you hope the puddles are water.

Just landed via Threads:

If dogs ever learn to talk, I want everyone to keep in mind that mine is a big fat liar.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

If biscuits were slimming and contained every nutrient the human body needs, I’d be in terrific shape.

Spreading quickly via X:

The walk of shame, except it’s me at a bowling alley walking back to sit down after I knock down zero pins with bumpers.

Share Wordgag 🙏

© 2025. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴