786 funny communication quotes - Page 5 - Wordgag ツ

You can just comment, “You two look nice,” on a photo of three people. It’s free and legal.

Feb 1, 2026

Can I come over and figure you out?

Feb 1, 2026

I get writer’s block responding to people.

Feb 1, 2026

Sorry, I can’t hang out. I don’t know enough words.

Feb 1, 2026

I would do absolutely anything for my friends, except answer their text messages.

Feb 1, 2026

Aliens probably have group chats called Don’t Stop on Earth.

Feb 1, 2026

Are you okay, babe? You’ve barely moved in mysterious ways recently.

Feb 1, 2026

Women love deciding to never talk to you again, and actually do it.

Feb 1, 2026

Talking to some people is like folding a fitted sheet.

Feb 1, 2026

“Why don’t you tell us anything anymore?” I’ve updated my privacy policy.

Feb 1, 2026

Deleting the paragraph you wrote and texting back “ok” is a different type of self-control.

Feb 1, 2026

Apparently, it’s rude to poke someone in the forehead and yell “Skip Intro” when they start talking to you.

Feb 1, 2026

So I got a call from a telemarketer, and he said he couldn’t understand me. I told him, “Press 1 for English.”

Feb 1, 2026

That “so we done?” be saving the relationship every time.

Feb 1, 2026

If only men knew the power “I made reservations, I’ll pick you up at 7” held instead of “I don’t know, whatever you wanna do.”

Feb 1, 2026

Listen up. If he hooks his sunglasses in the front collar of his shirt, he’s got something important to say.

Feb 1, 2026

“You never text back.” No, I be reading texts from the notification bar, then forget to text back.

Feb 1, 2026

“That’s an interesting take,” I say, not listening.

Feb 1, 2026

When people say they’re speechless, I always hope they mean it, but they never stop talking.

Feb 1, 2026

You miss 100% of the gossip from the phone calls you don’t answer.

Feb 1, 2026

A couple of birds are outside fighting. Wait. They’ve quieted down. There’s a third bird. I think he may be their therapist.

Feb 1, 2026

I will not accept a hint. I will act dumb until you say it clearly to me.

Feb 1, 2026

“You’re so quiet.” Thanks, I’m not comfortable around you.

Feb 1, 2026

I can keep my mouth shut, but you can read the subtitles on my face.

Feb 1, 2026

89% of the time when my husband tells me I look great, what he really means is, “We needed to leave five minutes ago.”

Feb 1, 2026

Stop eating around the bush or whatever the saying is.

Feb 1, 2026

Literally no one understands something more completely than a woman in a meeting who starts a question with “Just so I understand …”

Feb 1, 2026

I think you misunderstood – when I said, “Let me look into it,” that meant, “I don’t know exactly how to tell you no just yet.”

Feb 1, 2026

Asserting dominance by starting all my private DMs with “I hope this DM finds you well.

Feb 1, 2026

Most men don’t actually want to do things; they just want to talk about doing them.

Feb 1, 2026

When I bark at a dog, I always worry that I might have inadvertently said something wrong.

Feb 1, 2026

You’re a “haha” girl, and I’m an “lol” guy. It just wouldn’t work.

Feb 1, 2026

True bravery is getting a text from a woman with three questions in it, and only responding to one.

Feb 1, 2026

We live in a time where intelligent people are being silenced, so that stupid people won’t be offended.

Feb 1, 2026

I’m the kind of introvert who dodges phone calls but sends paragraphs in texts.

Feb 1, 2026

Twitter is the only place where well-articulated sentences still get misinterpreted. You can say “I like pancakes,” and somebody will say, “So you hate waffles?”

Feb 1, 2026

My dog understands several human words. I don’t understand any dog barks. He may be smarter than me.

Feb 1, 2026

The gossip in my town is faster than the Wi-Fi.

Feb 1, 2026

Hate it when my mouth says something my brain was trying to keep quiet.

Feb 1, 2026

Don’t worry, bro. She’s probably just working on a puzzle right now. She’ll get back to you.

Feb 1, 2026