Wordgag

10,000+ Funny Quotes

May 19, 2026

Grandparents were right. Sitting in a chair, doing nothing, and staring at nature is incredible.

Commentary:
Guess I was just practicing mindfulness before it was cool! 😎🌳🪑

Taking Adderall before going to lay on the beach so I can focus more on having a good time.
It’s so hot out here, I saw a bird blowing on a worm before he ate it.
I hate when my cat runs into my bedroom and hisses at an empty chair, then runs back out again; and I then have to fall asleep holding a crucifix.
Snaccident: eating a whole bag of Doritos in one sitting.
Some things are better left alone, like me, for instance.

Posted by:

Wordgag Team

If you’re staying overnight in the hospital, there should be a mystery you get to solve about the hospital.Jul 1, 2026
Have you ever listened to someone and realized their frontal lobe hasn’t finished marinating yet?Jul 1, 2026
I need a day between every day to recover from the day before, and prepare for the day coming.Jul 1, 2026
Shout out to people who rate and review things, because I don’t like to rate or review things, but I like to know how things are rated and reviewed.Jul 1, 2026
The extinction of the dinosaurs is technically the highest ratio of birds killed with one stone.Jul 1, 2026

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our epic collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥