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Commentary:
"Ah, the age-old wisdom of living with a dog: no need to worry about dropped food because you've got a furry cleanup crew on standby! 🐾 Who needs a vacuum when you've got a hungry pooch around? 😂🐶 #LifeHack"

cleaning, dog, dogs, dropped, dropped food, food, humor, i, joke, people, pet, pick, responsibility

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Sorry I was late, I was frantically applying to other jobs.

1 month ago
applying, career, excuse, frustration, humor, i, job, jobs, late, sorry, work
Why’d they call it a fly swatter and not a splatula?

1 month ago
call, fly, fly swatter, humor, insects, pun, splatula, swatter, wordplay
I made a clone of myself to do the dishes, another to do the laundry, and another to do the cooking, but we’re all sitting on the couch watching TV.

1 month ago
clone, cooking, couch, dishes, domestic, domestic tasks, humor, i, laundry, myself, procrastination, self-improvement, sitting, tasks, TV, watching
Me, on New Year’s Eve: I think instead of kissing at midnight, I’m just going to go outside and scream.

1 month ago
activity, celebration, eve, fun, fun activity, going, humor, i, just, kissing, me, midnight, new, New Year’s Eve, outside, scream, think, year’s
How did they get kids to pose for oil paintings? Mine won’t sit still for 4 seconds for a family photo.

1 month ago
4, family, family photo, humor, kids, mine, oil, oil painting, painting, paintings, parenting, photo, pose, seconds, sit, sit still, still
Good luck to everyone out there trying to gather enough energy to function this week.

1 month ago
energy, enough, everyone, fatigue, function, good, humor, luck, motivation, struggle, trying, week

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Someone from 🇷🇴 has downloaded:

I love how unforgiving soy sauce is. Cause you know immediately when you did too much with her.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has bookmarked:

I wish I had the free time of someone who leaves a positive Amazon review for a rake.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has copied:

Many fruits can be great names… but the real challenge is naming a child after a vegetable….

Someone from 🇨🇿 has copied:

Going from summer clothes to winter clothes: “Okay!” Going from winter clothes to summer clothes: “I AM NOT READY!”

Someone from 🇪🇸 has downloaded:

Just imagine how great life would be if pizza made you skinny.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has viewed:

Not using emoji while texting is my way to show that I’m serious.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has shared:

I took a pole and found that 100% of people in the tent were angry.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via LinkedIn:

So annoying that in order to meet new people you need to go out and meet new people. Ideally, I would have known you in a past life.

Breaking via LinkedIn:

Every gift guide for men is like “A flannel flask to hold your knife flavored whiskey.”

Live now on YouTube:

Just a little reminder to laugh as much as you can, stay hydrated, and don’t let shitty people kill your vibe.

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

Humanity doesn’t deserve a new year, look at the mess they made of the last one.

Shared recently on Discord:

I am a friend to all cats. Yes, even the mean ones. They have their reasons.

Making waves on Instagram:

Having a kid is so fun when you’re childish, like yeah, it’s my turn with the slime, boo.

Breaking via Threads:

They should invent something in between coffee and narcotics.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I have heard that people without dogs have to pick up dropped food themselves.

Sorry I was late, I was frantically applying to other jobs.

Why’d they call it a fly swatter and not a splatula?

I made a clone of myself to do the dishes, another to do the laundry, and another to do the cooking, but we’re all sitting on the couch watching TV.

Me, on New Year’s Eve: I think instead of kissing at midnight, I’m just going to go outside and scream.

How did they get kids to pose for oil paintings? Mine won’t sit still for 4 seconds for a family photo.

Good luck to everyone out there trying to gather enough energy to function this week.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Multitask? I can barely unitask.

Who develops the algorithm? I want to speak to the manager.

Since I started following the wisdom of ancient Chinese philosopher Fuk Yu, my life has been so much better…

Don’t ring my doorbell unless you’re accompanied by a camera crew and holding balloons and a big check.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

I get it, funds… I, too, am insufficient.

Chuck Norris got shot. The bullet is in critical condition.

People who leave the blinds closed the entire plane ride: who hurt you?

I started calling the new guy at work “Grok” because he thinks he knows everything.

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Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

People don’t catch bullets with their teeth anymore, get out there and practice.

That pile of clothes on my bed, seems to have strange powers and gets higher on its own.

Peak delusion is believing that a paragraph will make someone treat you better.

Anyone who lives within their means suffers from a lack of imagination.

Roses are red, violets are blue. When I listen to rock music, my neighbors do too.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Nowadays you don’t even have to go to the zoo. A trip to the mall is enough.

Date idea: We watch Breaking Bad and break your bed.

I don’t need to touch grass, I need to touch one million dollars cash.

Sperm me would be swimming in the other direction.

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I have heard that people without dogs have to pick up dropped food themselves.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Sorry I was late, I was frantically applying to other jobs.

Why’d they call it a fly swatter and not a splatula?

I made a clone of myself to do the dishes, another to do the laundry, and another to do the cooking, but we’re all sitting on the couch watching TV.

Me, on New Year’s Eve: I think instead of kissing at midnight, I’m just going to go outside and scream.

How did they get kids to pose for oil paintings? Mine won’t sit still for 4 seconds for a family photo.

Good luck to everyone out there trying to gather enough energy to function this week.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

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