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Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ซ๐Ÿ‡ฒ has downloaded:

My husband cleaned the kitchen for the first time in years. Heโ€™s in the living room, dressed in a suit, waiting for the award ceremony to commence.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡จ๐Ÿ‡ซ has shared:

I’ve never met a problem I couldn’t turn into a disaster.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡พ has viewed:

Tech enthusiasts: My entire house is smart. Tech workers: The only piece of technology in my house is a printer, and I keep a gun next to it so I can shoot it if it makes a noise I don’t recognize.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฒ๐Ÿ‡ฌ has copied:

It takes so much energy to go inside a Walmart.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡พ has downloaded:

In high school I was voted โ€œmost likely to hold a grudgeโ€ and Iโ€™m still mad about it.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฌ๐Ÿ‡ฆ has copied:

Never get in between a girl and her fries. Itโ€™s just common sense really.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฆ๐Ÿ‡น has downloaded:

Iโ€™m uncomfortable around tall people. What if they pick me up and put me on their shoulders?

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡ท has shared:

It’s amazing how music can transport you to another place. For example, this coffee shop is playing Justin Bieber, so I’m going to another restaurant.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ญ๐Ÿ‡ท has shared:

“You’re always sleeping!” God forbid a girl wants to be unconscious.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡น๐Ÿ‡ด has copied:

Lady just asked me what “mansplaining” is. I think it’s a trap. We’ve been staring at each other in silence for half an hour.

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I need to eat healthier but donuts exist.

Commentary:
"Trying to eat healthier but those delicious donuts just keep rolling into my life ๐Ÿฉ๐Ÿคทโ€โ™‚๏ธ Who can resist the temptation of a sprinkled sweet treat? Not me!"



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