39 funny temptation quotes - Wordgag

A chocolate advent calendar is a test of restraint that I simply do not have.

May 24, 2026

“This isn’t going to end well for you.” Me, alone in the house, to the cake on the counter.

May 23, 2026

You want me to go apple picking? The original sin?

May 23, 2026

A piece of chocolate contains just enough energy to take another one.

May 23, 2026

When I see chocolate, I hear two voices inside me. One says: “Eat it!”. The other says: “Did you hear that? You’re supposed to eat it!”

May 23, 2026

I don’t like the person I become when I’m alone in the break room with a box of donuts.

May 22, 2026

Me before grocery shopping: only healthy foods, no impulse buys, I can do this. Me during grocery shopping: they make chocolate filled marshmallows?

May 22, 2026

If you don’t buy any snacks, you’re proud for a moment and then incredibly sad.

May 21, 2026

My 3 weeks without sweets were over after 12 hours. Proof that time runs faster with increasing age.

May 21, 2026

“Out of sight, out of mind” doesn’t work for donuts.

May 21, 2026

Telling a child not to touch something only ensures that child is definitely now going to touch that something.

May 21, 2026

Accidentally made eye contact with the sweets at the grocery store and now have to declare bankruptcy.

May 21, 2026

I need to eat healthier but donuts exist.

May 21, 2026

Imagine being all knowing and still putting a snake in charge of apples.

May 20, 2026

Only thing sexier than a bad decisions is a bad decision with queso.

May 20, 2026

Dear resealable chocolate bag, your confidence in my self-control was truly inspiring. And you were delicious.

May 20, 2026

Today I bought a doughnut without sprinkles. This diet thing is hard.

May 20, 2026

My goal was to look good in a bikini this summer, but the call of the barbecue is stronger.

May 20, 2026

The algorithm knows about that thing you like that you’re denying yourself of.

May 19, 2026

The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was making all of the food that is unhealthy for you taste so good.

May 19, 2026

The problem with expensive things is that you tend to want them.

May 18, 2026

All of my fitness goals are within reach, but unfortunately, so are the crisps.

May 18, 2026

In your 20s, you will be tempted to prove that you’re doing well. It’s important you resist performing for an audience that isn’t watching.

Apr 1, 2026

“The heart wants what the heart wants,” I whisper as I slowly walk up to the dessert table.

Apr 1, 2026

Have you ever pretended not to look at the biscuits or sweets being handed around the room, and acted surprised when you got offered one?

Apr 1, 2026

I secretly want you to say no when I offer you some of my cake.

Mar 31, 2026

How does one stop eating ice cream when there’s still some in the container?

Mar 31, 2026

Yesterday, I went to the grocery store, and I managed to come home without any junk food. Now, I’m mad that we don’t have any junk food.

Mar 30, 2026

It’s hard to sleep knowing that cake is in the fridge.

Mar 30, 2026

It’s hard to sleep knowing that Coke is in the fridge.

Mar 30, 2026

Listen to your body? The body that craves a lethal amount of Kinder Bueno?

Mar 30, 2026

Not eating the cookie I’m craving. I better wake up skinny tomorrow.

Mar 29, 2026

I need someone to convince me into or out of buying a jetski. I can’t keep living in this purgatory.

Mar 29, 2026

Me, watching porn: they’re just going to let that pizza get cold?

Mar 29, 2026

The closest thing I’ve had to a personal trainer is the ice cream truck that drove past my house.

Mar 29, 2026

The toughest part of a diet isn’t watching what you eat. It’s watching what other people eat.

Mar 29, 2026

I can resist everything except temptation.

Mar 28, 2026

Whenever I’m willing to sell my soul, there’s usually food involved.

Mar 28, 2026

Gonna finish eating all these Christmas cookies so I’m no longer tempted to eat them.

Mar 27, 2026