I need to hire someone to just constantly slap food out of my hand. Posted on3 days ago by slickboy in Funny Quotes 💾 Save Image FacebookXPinterestRedditLinkedInEmailWhatsAppCommentary:"Why hire someone when you can just develop a self-slapping mechanism? 🤚🍔 It's the ultimate diet plan – guaranteed to keep those midnight snack cravings at bay! 😂 #HandSlapDiet" Related Funny Quotes 🤝 Anyone who deals with customers on a professional basis should be allowed to hand out one face slap per day. On one hand, it’s terrible to not have access to the Internet, but on the other hand, it’s terrible to have access to the Internet. Isn’t it weird that we have one hand that knows how to do everything and then one hand that just sits there like ‘I don’t know how to hold a pencil.’ On the one hand, I’d love to look sexy in a bikini. On the other hand, there’s cake. I was thinking of becoming self employed, but due to cutbacks, I can’t afford to hire me right now.