Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇼 has shared:

Half the world is mentally ill. The other half is to blame.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has copied:

That’s just brainslop. You only came up with that by thinking.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has shared:

Monsters can’t hide under my bed. That’s where my cats have their fight club.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has viewed:

“I’m disgusted by how many of you still use Spotify. I use a fair trade, ethically conscientious mom-and-pop platform called Apple Music.”

Someone from 🇸🇷 has shared:

Luckily, I realized that all this love I want to pour into someone else was actually meant for me.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has viewed:

Sorry I’m late — I was standing in the shower, thinking about stuff.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has bookmarked:

Sorry that I cannot come out drinking with you tonight, as I will be drinking at home. Alone. By myself.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has shared:

Kids: making things way more difficult when they don’t have to be, since the dawn of man.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has viewed:

Sometimes I delay my haircut intentionally to look rugged just to make that glow-up more iconic.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has downloaded:

“I have an AI boyfriend.” No, you don’t. It’s Adam and Eve or Adam and Steve, not Adam and USB.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

294 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,563

Funny Quotes Topics

17,619

Funny Quotes Images

15,563

Updated

Jan 11, 2026

Users Online

3,355

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Telegram:

Bugs Bunny taught me that my choices aren’t limited to fight or flight, I can also pretend I’m a pretty lady.

Trending via TikTok:

How coked up was the guy that came up with Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles?

Going viral on Messenger:

People shouldn’t be at the grocery store the same time as me. Get out of the way.

Seen just now on WeChat:

My three favorite things are eating my family and not using commas.

Just shared via Messenger:

The dead bodies on Mt. Everest remind me that it’s perfectly fine to stay home and be lazy.

Making waves on Telegram:

Go outside and let the rain do what your boyfriend can’t.

Just landed via X:

I love how a film can be life-changing for one person and boring for another.

Shared recently on YouTube:

I think my dog always follows me to the bathroom because I always follow him outside and he thinks that’s the way it works.

Making waves on Telegram:

Absolute worst time of year to have a secret family. Hands down.

Going bananas on Slack:

I don’t have red flags, I have fun facts.

I never though I’d be the kind of person who wakes up early to exercise. I was right.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Waking up early to exercise? More like hitting snooze and dreaming about being fit! 🛌😴💪 #MorningStruggles #FitnessGoalsFailed

early, exercise, i, ID, ironic, kind, never, person, right, wake, wake up

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Our neighbor complained that our cat is always running through his garden. My father said: “Okay, I’ll tell her.”

2 months ago

always, cat, complaint, conversation, father, garden, humor, neighbor, okay, running, tell
Trying to explain that I’m fascinated by Japan for wood joinery reasons and not nerd or pervert reasons.

2 months ago

explain, explanation, fascination, interest, Japan, joinery, nerd, pervert, reasons, trying, wood, wood joinery
Forgot how fun it is to post IG stories. I feel like a female filmmaker.

2 months ago

content, content creation, creation, feel, female, filmmaker, forgot, fun, i, ig, Instagram, Instagram story, media, post, social, social media, story
Going out to eat and shopping by yourself is actually one of the most peaceful and therapeutic things ever.

2 months ago

activity, actually, alone, alone time, care, eat, eating, eating out, ever, going, me, me time, most, peace, peaceful, relaxation, self, self-care, shopping, solo, solo activity, therapy, things, time, yourself
It’s wild that “Jason” is a name from ancient Greece, because it sounds like it was invented in Florida in 1983.

2 months ago

1983, ancient, ancient Greece, Florida, greece, historical, historical reference, humor, Jason, name, name humor, origin, reference, sounds, wild, word, word origin
Knowledge is like underwear. It is useful to have it, but not necessary to show it off.

3 months ago

humor, knowledge, lesson, life, life lesson, modesty, show, show off, underwear, useful, wisdom

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

23 shares on Slack this month:

If you add orange juice to Jason Momoa, you get a Jason Mimosa.

17 shares on Facebook this month:

Playdates were invented to force parents into cleaning their home.

72 shares on YouTube this month:

Part of fatherhood is becoming an expert in some obscure topic and teaching it to your children who stopped listening 30 minutes ago.

51 shares on YouTube this month:

My ex had this fetish where he would dress up in his own clothes and act like an idiot.

98 shares on Pinterest this month:

You couldn’t pay me to do this year again.

96 shares on Instagram this month:

Just spent a couple seconds concerned about the sounds my stomach was making before realizing it was a motorcycle outside.

42 shares on Messenger this month:

Sunglasses: allowing you to stare at people without getting caught. It’s like Facebook in real life.

13 shares on Telegram this month:

I’m at the age where I see a huge, beautiful mansion in a movie and think, “How much does it cost to heat that house in the winter?”

96 shares on Telegram this month:

“You smell so good!” Okay, so kiss me.

34 shares on TikTok this month:

My boyfriend moved in with me straight from Hotel Mama. In a way, I’m now a single parent.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇫 has downloaded:

If by ‘leg day’ you mean a day that we put your legs on my shoulders, then yes, I love leg day.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has viewed:

I was feeling kinda lonely this morning so I glued a coffee cup to the top of my car so people would wave at me.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has bookmarked:

I love sarcasm. It’s like punching people in the face, but with words.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has viewed:

Not to brag but this cashier is checking me out.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has viewed:

Girls be like, “Baby, I have a great idea,” and it’s a trip you have to pay for.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has bookmarked:

There will never be a perfect time. Make that mistake now.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has copied:

Was complaining to my mom about my daughter’s attitude and she told me I should’ve named her payback.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has copied:

Netflix will help you finish the name of the movie you’re typing, and then tell you they don’t have it.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has copied:

Rewatching my story every time somebody heart it to see what they see.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has bookmarked:

Is it just me or does everything cost like we’re shopping in an airport now?

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via YouTube:

I need an Apple Watch that tracks when my patience runs out.

Just landed via Facebook:

It turns out when someone asks who your favorite child is, you’re supposed to choose from your own. I know that now.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

I’m tired of things costing money.

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

Changing my passwords regularly has certainly helped protect my accounts. Against me.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Just got chills imagining what Tom and Jerry could accomplish if they just worked together for once.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Don’t you hate it when you offer help and the other person says yes?

Spotted on X:

No one lies more than a parent who says, “We’ll see.” You know we’re not seeing anything.

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

That awkward moment when a zombie looking for brains walks right past you.

Broadcasted on Reddit:

Is Mercury in reggaeton?

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I never though I’d be the kind of person who wakes up early to exercise. I was right.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Our neighbor complained that our cat is always running through his garden. My father said: “Okay, I’ll tell her.”

Trying to explain that I’m fascinated by Japan for wood joinery reasons and not nerd or pervert reasons.

Forgot how fun it is to post IG stories. I feel like a female filmmaker.

Going out to eat and shopping by yourself is actually one of the most peaceful and therapeutic things ever.

It’s wild that “Jason” is a name from ancient Greece, because it sounds like it was invented in Florida in 1983.

Knowledge is like underwear. It is useful to have it, but not necessary to show it off.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨