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"Oh no, it sounds like your gym membership might be hiding in the locker room! 🏋️‍♂️ Don't worry, maybe it's just doing some extra squats and push-ups on its own. 😂💪 It's always worth checking in with those elusive gym gains – they can be quite the sneaky little devils! 🕵️‍♂️ #MysteryOfTheMissingMuscles"

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Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Is it ‘My wife and I’ or ‘Me and my wife’? Anyway, we just robbed a liquor store.

1 month ago
couple, crime, grammar, humor, i, just, liquor, liquor store, me, robbery, store, wife
Don’t stress about your eyesight failing as you get older. It’s nature’s way of protecting you from shock as you walk past the mirror.

1 month ago
aging, eyesight, failing, humor, mirror, nature, older, past, self-image, shock, stress, walk
Dear 8 hours of sleep, I miss you so much.

1 month ago
exhaustion, humor, i, longing, miss, relationship, rest, sleep, time
Is there a rehab for introverts who try to extrovert? Asking for a friend.

5 months ago
asking, awkwardness, extrovert, friend, humor, interaction, introvert, personality, rehab, social, social interaction, try
Harry Potter is sort of crazy. I would have never fought a war for my high school.

1 month ago
crazy, harry, Harry Potter, high, high school, i, never, potter, school, sort, war
As long as you don’t ever give them your real name, they can’t accuse you of not keeping the mystery alive in your relationship.

1 month ago
accuse, alive, dating, deception, ever, fun, give, humor, mystery, name, privacy, real, relationship, secrecy

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Someone from 🇫🇲 has shared:

Since the beginning of time itself, people have been wondering, what the hell is going on?

Someone from 🇮🇹 has shared:

I miss my kids the most when they go to bed and the mosquitoes go after me because they have no other options.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has downloaded:

Have you tried just not thinking about it? Like, ever again?

Someone from 🇨🇷 has bookmarked:

I used to be cool and now I say things like “It’s so loud in here, I can’t hear myself think”.

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One week of daily crunches and I have abs…urdly underestimated how long it will take to see results.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has copied:

People always tell me I’d be “late to my own funeral” like it’s a bad thing. They’d be lucky if I even showed up to that depressing shit.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has downloaded:

The devil couldn’t reach me so he made sure my love life was bullshit.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on YouTube:

I bet my soulmate is out there somewhere pretending everything is fine.

Just shared via Twitch:

I don’t do “casual.” I’m like an 18th-century vampire. When I fall in love, my devotion is boundless and eternal.

Going bananas on LinkedIn:

Rudolph, with your nose so bright, help me find my phone tonight.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Them: Money doesn’t bring happiness. Me: Pass the money over here, I like to be sad.

Shared recently on Discord:

Ever since I was a little kid I always knew I wanted to struggle to survive.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

I’m tired of adding ‘LOL’ to the end of my texts for sensitive people.

Just shared via Pinterest:

If I had known how much care balcony plants need, I could have stopped taking the pill.

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I signed up to the gym a few months ago and still don’t see any results. I’ll go by there this weekend and ask what’s going on.

Is it ‘My wife and I’ or ‘Me and my wife’? Anyway, we just robbed a liquor store.

Don’t stress about your eyesight failing as you get older. It’s nature’s way of protecting you from shock as you walk past the mirror.

Dear 8 hours of sleep, I miss you so much.

Harry Potter is sort of crazy. I would have never fought a war for my high school.

As long as you don’t ever give them your real name, they can’t accuse you of not keeping the mystery alive in your relationship.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Having a toddler is wild. I’m getting breaking news about Peppa Pig.

You can’t spell dyslexia without sexy.

No one knows what I’m up to, not even me.

Don’t flirt with me. I’ll show up at your house and start eating all your snacks.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Fun fact: a person’s music taste can actually tell their intelligence level.

I just want someone who can read a book with me in silence, and then do ungodly things sometimes.

I get it, funds… I, too, am insufficient.

Had to sit with a straight face while my landlord told me I was paying his rent and mortgage for him.

Let’s get married and have kids, so instead of relaxing during weeknights, we can go to seven practices and relearn algebra.

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Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Waiting for toast to toast takes forever unless you walk away for 10 seconds, then it burns.

Did you guys know that you can actually do whatever you want all the time?

Why is smoking the only addiction jobs give you breaks to do? I should get 15 minutes every hour to cook up some parlays.

People who say that they don’t have time for my bullshit should wake up an hour earlier.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Sorry, I wasn’t really listening but that’s awesome, unless it isn’t of course.

Take my advice, I’m not using it.

Adulthood is basically just trying to fall asleep at night and stay awake during the day.

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I signed up to the gym a few months ago and still don’t see any results. I’ll go by there this weekend and ask what’s going on.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Is it ‘My wife and I’ or ‘Me and my wife’? Anyway, we just robbed a liquor store.

Don’t stress about your eyesight failing as you get older. It’s nature’s way of protecting you from shock as you walk past the mirror.

Dear 8 hours of sleep, I miss you so much.

Is there a rehab for introverts who try to extrovert? Asking for a friend.

Harry Potter is sort of crazy. I would have never fought a war for my high school.

As long as you don’t ever give them your real name, they can’t accuse you of not keeping the mystery alive in your relationship.

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