Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇻 has copied:

I love when my cat sighs at me, like what’s got you stressed out my little freeloading homicidal maniac!?

Someone from 🇨🇿 has bookmarked:

Beautiful women named Severe Thunderstorm Warning are blowing up my phone.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has viewed:

Just realised if I have a kid, they’re likely to see the year 2100… WTF?

Someone from 🇻🇨 has copied:

Half of all the problems in life can be solved by duct tape. For the rest, you’re gonna have to reboot that computer.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has bookmarked:

Got a job rejection, saw the company post the same job again, so I applied again. I decide when we’re done.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has bookmarked:

I have had songs stuck in my head and I have had people stuck in my head, I highly recommend songs.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has copied:

No one told me adulthood would require this much multi-factor authentication.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has downloaded:

Naturally introverted, selectively extroverted.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has shared:

Wine must breathe. I always hear that wine needs to breathe. I want to drink it and not revive it.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has copied:

Summer Olympics is just me swimming in sweat and wrestling with my sports bra.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

241 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,510

Funny Quotes Topics

17,577

Funny Quotes Images

15,510

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,589

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via LinkedIn:

I can’t believe we live in the timeline where we invented a technology to make it so we can never trust a photo or video again.

Trending via Twitch:

Relationships: Because sometimes destroying your life is a two person job.

Just landed via Telegram:

Due to circumstances beyond my control, I am at work.

Just shared via YouTube:

Everything is a sign from God if you’re schizophrenic enough.

Just shared via Slack:

I’m so old I remember when a hashtag was called a pound sign, and we played tic-tac-toe on top of it.

Making waves on TikTok:

My dogs don’t feel earthquakes because they have constant gas.

Just shared via Snapchat:

Don’t date coworkers. Being the hot coworker nobody at work has a chance with is always the best role to play.

Seen just now on Messenger:

I hope I don’t die of something stupid like old age, I want a piano to fall on my head.

Just shared via YouTube:

I have a lot to offer! Most of it’s bad, but it’s still a lot.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Facing my uncle’s dreaded lightning bolt attack at the Thanksgiving dinner table.

I was in a good mood until I realized not only was it not Friday it wasn’t even Thursday.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Haha, the struggle is real! 😅🗓️ Looks like your weekend was just a distant dream! 😂🙃

day, disappointment, even, Friday, frustration, good, humor, i, mood, only, realization, Thursday

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I don’t drink coffee all the time. I take breaks in between to make another one.

0

2 months ago

another, breaks, coffee, drink, humor, i, routine, take, time
I’m not old, I’m vintage.

0

2 months ago

age, humor, life, old, perspective, self-deprecation, vintage, wisdom
Anyone who thinks things have got so bad that they can only get better is showing a remarkable lack of imagination.

0

2 months ago

bad, better, expectations, humor, imagination, optimism, perspective, pessimism, reality, things
Inside you, there are two wolves. Kevin Costner is dancing with both of them. I don’t know how this works.

0

1 month ago

both, conflict, costner, dance, dancing, humor, i, inner, inner conflict, inside, Kevin, Kevin Costner, know, wolf, works
So many people say they love their Roomba, but you never see them set it free.

0

2 months ago

cleaning, free, freedom, humor, irony, love, never, people, pet, robot, Roomba, say, technology
We go together like coffee and cigarettes.

0

2 months ago

activity, addiction, cigarettes, coffee, compatibility, fun, fun activity, humor, relationship, together

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

80 shares on Threads this month:

Today, I noticed that the cover of my ironing board was wrinkled, and I laughed at the irony. Then I laughed again because of the word “irony.”

86 shares on TikTok this month:

I was googling the best time to visit Italy. It is when you have money.

70 shares on Pinterest this month:

They’re making me do work at work.

66 shares on Reddit this month:

Ever since I was a little girl, I’ve always known I wanted to be a woman with a lot of money when I grew up.

43 shares on TikTok this month:

It’s Mother’s Day Eve so remember to leave out a bottle of wine for Mom when she comes down the chimney.

26 shares on WeChat this month:

Staring at the sky for answers, nothing new.

95 shares on Pinterest this month:

I used to think I was indecisive, but I’m not too sure any more.

74 shares on Pinterest this month:

In Russia, the cold complains about you.

88 shares on Facebook this month:

I worry a lot about the wild animals in my neighborhood, but I’m beginning to think they don’t worry about me.

28 shares on YouTube this month:

I get so flattered when butterflies or bees buzz around me. Like, sorry ladies, I’m not a flower, but it’s so sweet that you thought I was. Hehe.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇩 has downloaded:

I accidentally hit a parked car, so I left them a note that said “next time it will be you”.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has bookmarked:

The Internet is fun because you can post about banana bread and somehow end up in a fight.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has shared:

I didn’t believe in karma until I was scheduled to work at 6am on a holiday.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has shared:

I’m at the age where I consider any picture of me taken in the last ten years “current.”

Someone from 🇪🇪 has bookmarked:

I love admitting when I’m wrong, because it gives me a break from always being right, like finally.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has copied:

Whoever said “team work makes the dream work” needs to explain that to my many personalities.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has bookmarked:

You don’t do laundry once a week. You do it constantly, endlessly, forever—until you die.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has shared:

I’ve broken all my New Year’s Resolutions so now I’m moving on to laws of nature.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has bookmarked:

I am cool with January lasting forever because rent is due February 1.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has shared:

Easiest way to ragebait a finance bro is to start the ‘why can’t we print more money’ conversation.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

We were supposed to have flying cars and other cool stuff, but instead we have AI videos showing Michael Jackson eat at McDonald’s.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Don’t invite me anywhere last minute. I enjoy doing nothing, so I need to know ahead of time if my plan to do nothing needs to be changed.

Just shared via Facebook:

Whoever came up with the name “dentures” really missed the opportunity to call them “substitooths”.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

I’m actually quite nice. If I had friends, they’d all confirm that.

Just shared via Telegram:

“But it’s summer,” is going to be my excuse for everything from now until the end of September.

Just landed via TikTok:

It’s only 9am and I’ve already ruined my son’s entire life by giving him the banana with the brown spot on it.

Going bananas on WhatsApp:

Now that Christmas and New Year are out of the way, we can focus on the things that really matter: My posts.

Breaking via Snapchat:

Starting the second half of your sandwich is like “hell yeah, baby, let’s run it back!”

Seen just now on Discord:

Where do they get the seeds to plant seedless watermelons?

Spotted on Snapchat:

Sometimes I say something so embarrassing I even impress myself.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I was in a good mood until I realized not only was it not Friday it wasn’t even Thursday.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

I don’t drink coffee all the time. I take breaks in between to make another one.

I’m not old, I’m vintage.

Anyone who thinks things have got so bad that they can only get better is showing a remarkable lack of imagination.

Inside you, there are two wolves. Kevin Costner is dancing with both of them. I don’t know how this works.

So many people say they love their Roomba, but you never see them set it free.

We go together like coffee and cigarettes.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨