Trendy Funny Quotes

  • Having to choose between an old guy or a convicted felon is a perfect depiction of what dating apps are Iike.
  • Explain it to me like I’m five then do it for me like I’m one hundred.
  • When someone asks me why I’m leaving the party early, I say “I’m late for an appointment with my pajamas.”
  • Only 6 hours, 45 minutes and 35 years until I’m done with work.
  • Good morning, dickhead, your little ray of sarcastic sunshine has arrived.
  • Work meetings would be a lot more fun if they took place in a giant IKEA ball pit.