Marry the man who treats your dumb questions like they’re NASA-level problems.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has bookmarked:

One of my biggest talents is taking hundreds of screenshots that I swear I’ll need, but I never look at them again.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has shared:

Everything is dishwasher safe if you don’t care enough about it.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has bookmarked:

I wish I had the determination of my wife, who’s still flipping through radio stations as we pull into our driveway.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has copied:

Canadians are nice because they’re close to Santa.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has shared:

In a massage chair at the mall just moaning really loud.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has copied:

Dear God, thank you for the job I have. But if you have a lottery win planned for me, I’m ready! Thank you.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has shared:

I made a clone of myself to do the dishes, another to do the laundry, and another to do the cooking, but we’re all sitting on the couch watching TV.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has bookmarked:

If you’re wondering how motherhood is going, I’m watching a TV show and someone is in traction with a full body cast and I sighed and said “That looks so relaxing”

Someone from 🇸🇱 has bookmarked:

No matter how small you make that “unsubscribe” link, I’ll still find it.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has downloaded:

Remember: The first step to recovery is addiction.