Not to brag, but my children already knew everything I told them today.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has bookmarked:

Engaging in deforestation (trimming my bush).

Someone from 🇯🇲 has copied:

Whether you rip off a bandaid quickly or slowly, I find it’s best to ask the wearer’s permission first.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has shared:

The way some people hold their cell phone to make a call, I always think they’re trying to take a bite out of a sandwich.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has viewed:

I listen to a lot of white noise, so I get really excited when it rains or someone turns on a fan. It’s like seeing my favorite band live.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has downloaded:

Gordon Ramsay is making us dinner. It’s a four curse meal.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has bookmarked:

“Work smarter, not harder.” Brother, I’m not doing either of those things.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has downloaded:

I don’t want kids, but I do want grandkids. Hoping science finds a way.