Wordgag 🎅

Commentary:
"Parents: the only people who simultaneously teach you skepticism and fall for a 'Free Cruise to the Bahamas' ad on Facebook. The irony is strong with this one!"

believe, difference, everything, Facebook, generational, generational difference, humor, internet, irony, media, parent, parents, social, social media, trust

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I don’t drink and drive, but some people drive me to drink.

0

2 months ago

alcohol, drama, drink, drinking, drive, driving, friendship, humor, humor quote, i, me, party, people, relationship
I’m just going to flip this omelette… Okay, we’re having scrambled eggs.

0

2 months ago

cooking, egg, eggs, fail, flip, food, food fail, going, humor, just, kitchen, kitchen mishap, mishap, okay, omelette, scrambled, scrambled egg
Parents be like “don’t believe everything you see on the internet” then believe everything they see on Facebook.

0

2 months ago

believe, difference, everything, Facebook, generational, generational difference, humor, internet, irony, media, parent, parents, social, social media, trust
I hate to slut-shame, but a lot of you are not slutty enough.

0

3 months ago

commentary, enough, hate, humor, i, irony, lot, slut-shame, slutty, social, social commentary
Women love deciding to never talk to you again, and actually do it.

0

1 month ago

actually, again, breakup, communication, decision, humor, love, never, relationship, sarcasm, talk, women
I’m never drinking again, unless something is going on later today.

0

2 months ago

activity, again, drinking, fun, going, humor, later, never, promise, something, today

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

63 shares on TikTok this month:

Ah yes, my abandonment issues due to all the abandonment.

22 shares on YouTube this month:

Welcome to college, where every single person is smarter than you, except for the three people in your group project.

14 shares on Reddit this month:

Why do we say ‘slept like a baby’? Babies wake up every two hours crying. I want to sleep like my cat—14 hours, no responsibilities, zero regrets.

53 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Don’t drink to forget me, you’ll end up seeing me double.

61 shares on YouTube this month:

A girl hating you is a million times better than her calling you a ‘nice guy’.

89 shares on X this month:

I’m not lazy, I’m an inactivist.

81 shares on Instagram this month:

My favorite hobby is withering away.

85 shares on Reddit this month:

Handyman to customer: If I had wanted you to watch me work, I would have become an actor.

15 shares on Telegram this month:

Daffodil totally sounds like an insult, you blooming daffodil.

46 shares on WeChat this month:

It’s not that I want more shoes, it’s just that they keep making them in my size.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇳 has downloaded:

Super excited about a brand new week of faking it.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has downloaded:

Who called them sea lions and not soggy doggies?

Someone from 🇷🇴 has bookmarked:

About to watch Tenet for the first time and I enjoyed it.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has downloaded:

I believe the IRS is days away from having a nuclear weapon.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has viewed:

Who’s going to run in movies when Tom Cruise retires?

Someone from 🇹🇳 has downloaded:

To all the people who ask singles why they are actually single: Please don’t. We have sworn an oath and are not allowed to tell you the secret of our success.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has copied:

What’s wrong, babe? You hardly touched your own advice you give to others.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has viewed:

Forget Spotify Wrapped. I’m more interested in seeing your Pornhub Wrapped.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has bookmarked:

A gentleman always straightens out the vending machine after shaking it.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has bookmarked:

I feel like people just come to the airport to cough.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on WeChat:

At my age, “getting lucky” means walking into a room and remembering what you came in there for.

Going bananas on Pinterest:

I don’t like people who take drugs, for example: airport security.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

Someone asked me how much I spend on a bottle of wine. 30 minutes was not the right answer.

Making waves on Twitch:

I hate having a body, it’s so high maintenance. Shower this, eat that, drink this, sleep that, it’s all very stupid.

Going viral on X:

Why put off until tomorrow what you can have an intern do today?

Going bananas on Instagram:

Welcome to your 40s. You now pay for 7 streaming services, only use 4 and can’t remember the password to any of them.

Just landed via Snapchat:

Introverts don’t recharge with sleep, we recharge by being left completely alone for 3–5 business days.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

Awkwardly stares into the abyss in between meetings.

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

Coughing has finally overtaken speaking Arabic as the most taboo thing to do in an airport.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

My retirement plan is recording a hit Christmas song. I just need to learn how to sing and write music.

Wordgag 🎅

Activity Log ✨

Parents be like “don’t believe everything you see on the internet” then believe everything they see on Facebook.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

I don’t drink and drive, but some people drive me to drink.

I’m just going to flip this omelette… Okay, we’re having scrambled eggs.