Person: gives compliment. Me: let me give you a brief synopsis of why you are sorely mistaken.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has bookmarked:

I’ve never really had a beach body, but my snowman body is coming along quite nicely.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has viewed:

Not to brag, but I can trip over things that aren’t even there!

Someone from 🇸🇨 has bookmarked:

Did it hurt, when my ice cream outlasted yours?

Someone from 🇰🇷 has copied:

Blocking someone isn’t enough, I also want them to get lice.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has bookmarked:

Please stop adding touchscreens to cars. Most of these idiots can barely drive as it is.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has bookmarked:

The theory that two stacked beds can’t be converted into two regular beds has been debunked.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has viewed:

I hope the ghost of Michael Jackson Hee-Hee’s in your ear while you tryna sleep.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has bookmarked:

In a parallel universe, there’s a happy me.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has viewed:

We go together like Drunk and Disorderly.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has copied:

Saw an article on “100 things to do before you die.” Was surprised Call 911 didn’t make the list.