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Commentary:
"Who knew birdwatching was just a gateway to accepting my inner old person vibes! Time to grab the binoculars and start squawking! 🦜👀😅"

animals, appeal, birdwatching, hobby, humor, i, leisure, little, myself, nature, older, pastime, start, troublemaker, understand, watching

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

But what if I don’t want someone that’s good for me?

0

5 months ago

contradiction, good, humor, i, me, preference, relationship, self-awareness, someone, want
Does anyone else run a used match under water before disposing of it because you’re afraid it still has some fire left in it, or are you normal?

0

3 days ago

afraid, anxiety, anyone, before, disposal, else, fear, fire, humor, left, match, normal, run, safety, still, under, used, water
Where do you see yourself five beers from now? What’s your five-beer plan?

0

2 months ago

activity, alcohol, beer, beers, casual, drinking, five, fun, fun activity, humor, joke, plan, social, where, yourself
Never underestimate my ability to stare out a window and not speak for hours on a car ride.

0

3 months ago

ability, car, car ride, hours, never, patience, quiet, ride, silence, speak, stare, staring, underestimate, window
I don’t even know who’s famous anymore.

0

2 months ago

celebrity, confusion, even, famous, humor, i, identity, know
The masculine urge to make a woman sit through a YouTube video that she will not find funny or entertaining.

0

2 months ago

activity, entertaining, entertainment, Funny, gender, gender humor, humor, masculine, masculine urge, relationship, shared, shared activity, sit, through, urge, video, woman, YouTube

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

18 shares on Facebook this month:

Sex makes you happy. So I understand your dissatisfaction.

87 shares on Slack this month:

Just got diagnosed with needing a hot chocolate with extra marshmallows.

32 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I don’t have a new year resolution, you don’t need that when you’re perfect.

93 shares on YouTube this month:

Another beautiful day, ruined by responsibility.

16 shares on Reddit this month:

What an awful time to be even remotely aware of what is going on in the world.

99 shares on LinkedIn this month:

In the 80s, if you woke up feeling thirsty, you could drink some of your waterbed.

29 shares on Pinterest this month:

Crying while wearing a backpack has unlocked a new level of humiliation I did not know was possible.

57 shares on WeChat this month:

My wallet is empty, just like my soul.

10 shares on X this month:

I’ve decided to give people an attitude instead of gifts this year.

30 shares on YouTube this month:

Imagine how loud a centipede would be if they wore tiny little flip flops.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇿 has downloaded:

I don’t wanna party like it’s 1999, I want to pay my bills like it’s 1999.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has downloaded:

Washing my hands in the sink and then wiping them on my cat, like a towel.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has shared:

Went on a date with a guy who didn’t ask me any questions about myself, so it’s on him when he finds out about my husband.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has shared:

I’m so single, even my husband won’t match with me on Tinder.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has bookmarked:

How much chocolate is too much chocolate before it is technically no longer a salad?

Someone from 🇸🇮 has shared:

Fact: WhatsApp is the most boring app if you’re single.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has downloaded:

No, I don’t like nature. I can’t respect anything that would so flippantly turn dinosaurs into birds.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has viewed:

I’ve learned a lot over the years, but the best advice I can ever give someone is never buy a used harmonica.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has copied:

I’m not even sure what I’m doing on this planet.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has downloaded:

I see why grandmas used to cook dinner at 3 p.m. and sit down the rest of the day.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Twitch:

If you shouldn’t go food shopping when you’re hungry, then you should definitely not go clothes shopping when you’re naked. Trust me on this.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

I’ll let you guys know if the psych ward has wifi.

Going viral on Reddit:

I’m not humiliating myself here for 3 likes. 10 maybe but not 3.

Just shared via Discord:

I know I seem a little crazy sometimes, but that’s because I AM.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

Driving is great because it combines my love of sitting with my love of being mad.

Making waves on Pinterest:

A haunted house, but it’s just you inside your own head.

Making waves on Telegram:

The best way for me to stick to my diet is to go straight back to sleep after breakfast.

Live now on Messenger:

I get it, drug commercials. I too like to dance while I describe all my side effects.

Just landed via Messenger:

This quote is invisible. Only people who masturbate a lot can read it.

Just shared via Discord:

I can’t work under these festive conditions.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

The older I get, the more I start to understand the appeal of birdwatching as a hobby. I do find myself watching these little troublemakers quite often.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

But what if I don’t want someone that’s good for me?

Does anyone else run a used match under water before disposing of it because you’re afraid it still has some fire left in it, or are you normal?

Where do you see yourself five beers from now? What’s your five-beer plan?

Never underestimate my ability to stare out a window and not speak for hours on a car ride.

I don’t even know who’s famous anymore.

The masculine urge to make a woman sit through a YouTube video that she will not find funny or entertaining.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨