With age comes wisdom. And digestive trouble.

With age comes wisdom. And digestive trouble.
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Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • If a company’s hiring sign says, “Come grow with us,” you’re about to do the job of 3-5 people.

    Commentary:
    “Reading between the lines of a ‘Come grow with us’ sign: Get ready to sprout some extra arms and legs, because you’re in for a multi-tasking marathon! 🌱💼🏃‍♂️ #TeamOfOne”

  • Going to therapy is like having someone walk around your brain and going “ohhhh, this is how you’re living?!”

    Commentary:
    “Therapy – where even your brain gets a professional reality check 🧠🚶‍♂️ ‘Ohhh, so that’s how you’ve been rolling all this time?'” 🤣

  • Slowly descending into madness. Anyone want anything?

    Commentary:
    🤪 “Slowly descending into madness…but hey, at least there’s company! Anyone want anything? Maybe a straightjacket or some sanity pills? Asking for a friend 🤪🤯 #MadnessMonday”

  • I tried to act normal once, worst five minutes of my life.

    Commentary:
    “Attempting to act normal is like trying to fit a square peg in a round hole – it just doesn’t work! 🤪 Embrace your quirks and let your unique self shine, it’s way more fun that way! 🌟 #NormalIsOverrated”

  • Drivers seem to underestimate how willing I am to get knocked down at a zebra crossing to prove a point.

    Commentary:
    “Watch out, world! This pedestrian means business 💪🚶‍♂️ Don’t underestimate their commitment to zebra stripes and justice! 🦓 #CrosswalkWarrior”

  • If you don’t have at least one white friend named “Matt”, then you are Matt.

    Commentary:
    Ah, the classic case of “If you can’t find a Matt, you’re the Matt” situation! 🤔 It’s like the universe’s way of saying, “Hey, buddy, where’s your Matt at?” 😅 Just remember, if you find yourself surrounded by non-Matts, well, you might just have to embrace your inner Mattness! 🧑🏻‍💼 #MattMystery