Wouldn’t it be great if we could put ourselves in the dryer and come out wrinkle free?

Wouldn't it be great if we could put ourselves in the dryer and come out wrinkle free?

Commentary:
🧺 “Wouldn’t it be fantastic if life had a ‘dryer’ setting to iron out all our wrinkles – both literal and metaphorical? Just pop yourself in, set it to ‘wrinkle-free,’ and emerge refreshed and smooth like a freshly laundered shirt. Ah, the dream! 😂✨”

Advertisement

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • Shut up brain, I wasn’t even talking to me.

    Commentary:
    “Classic case of brain, always butting in uninvited! 🧠🤐 Just a friendly reminder to mind your own neurons, buddy 😂 #InnerMonologueIssues”

  • Your honor, my client would like to play on his phone for a little bit

    Commentary:
    “Your honor, my client requests a brief recess to engage in a stimulating game of Candy Crush! 🍭⚖️ Let’s admit it, even justice could use a little swipe and tap now and then. #PhoneDefenseWinning”

  • I wish there was a nicer way to say “my natural tendency to spot patterns is making me feel very uncomfortable about you”.

    Commentary:
    “Me to someone who can’t hide their chaotic energy: ‘My inner pattern detective is having a meltdown thanks to you 🕵️‍♂️🚨 Maybe we can find some balance between your chaos and my compulsive need for order?’ 😂”

  • I wish we were cats so you could just randomly slap co-workers for no reason.

    Commentary:
    “If only we lived in a purr-fect world where we could use our feline instincts to handle office conflicts! 😼 Just imagine the satisfaction of swatting away those annoying emails and deadlines! 🐾 #MeowtivationMonday”

  • I used to work at McDonald’s and we only told ugly people that the ice cream machine was broken. So I have bad news if you were ever denied ice cream.

    Commentary:
    “Well, if you were told the ice cream machine was broken at McDonald’s, you might want to take that as a compliment in disguise! Who knew getting denied ice cream could be a subtle flattery? 🍦😂 #IceCreamDiscrimination”

  • Don’t go keto, go pirate. Rum, fish and beef jerky diet.

    Commentary:
    Ahoy, matey! 🏴‍☠️ Who needs to sail the keto seas when you can join the pirate crew on a diet of rum, fish, and beef jerky? 🍖🐟 Swashbuckle your way to a healthier lifestyle, and remember, a pirate’s life is always full of adventure (and tasty snacks)! ⚓️🌊 #PirateDietGoals