Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • If my wife and I got divorced and moved to separate states, I’m convinced I would still hear her chewing.
  • Wife is temporary. Being the hot EX is forever.
  • I hurt my bottom after shaking it at the office party. It was a twerk-place injury.
  • “No idea” doesn’t mean I don’t know the answer. I just don’t want to have a conversation.
  • Just once I’d like my dog to give me a treat.
  • How you conduct yourself when using plastic wrap is the real you.