Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • Big fan of the comma, just great. Like look, I just made you pause the sentence as you read it. Oh look, I just did it again.
  • You can count the number of times my wife has agreed with me on one hand, if you don’t have fingers.
  • You are allowed to be crazy as long as you are equally as hot.
  • I love being an adult and sitting absolutely still and suddenly I’ve hurt my neck somehow.
  • They probably killed the first few people whose eyes turned red in a photograph before they realized it wasn’t any demon stuff.
  • I can usually cope with the opinions of others because I don’t listen.