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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇺 has shared:

Keep your friend’s toast and your enemy’s toaster.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has bookmarked:

I don’t need Halloween. I have strange characters around me all year round.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has shared:

Sorry for the things I said when I thought you weren’t listening.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has downloaded:

That awkward moment when you spend an hour online picking out a gift for your friend’s son’s birthday and Amazon tells you it’s been a year since you bought this item.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has bookmarked:

I always have a cheap bottle of wine in the house in case any family visit.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has downloaded:

Everyone knows that Christmas is the celebration of the immaculate conception of Mariah Carey.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has viewed:

Only mosquitoes find me attractive. Nobody else.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has viewed:

You look like the kind of person whose recorded calls have been used for training purposes.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has copied:

Sorry, my face wasn’t created to hide that much distain for what you’re saying.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has downloaded:

Guns N’ Roses: “Welcome to the jungle!” The jungle: “No more humans, please!”

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

730 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,892

Funny Quotes Topics

13,871

Funny Quotes Images

10,892

39 minutes ago

3,422

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Facebook:

I’ve got nothing against kids, I just don’t understand why you’d want indoor kids.

Shared recently on Instagram:

I don’t jump to conclusions, I cannonball into them like a boss.

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

The longest drum solo was 10 hours and 26 minutes and was performed by the child sitting behind me on a flight from LA to Tokyo.

Broadcasted on WeChat:

If camera lenses are round, why are the pictures square?

Going viral on Telegram:

Just had a crazy revelation: you can eat in the airport after your flight, too.

Just shared via WeChat:

No one is more surprised than my kids every night when I say it’s bed time.

Trending via Snapchat:

Since the beginning of time itself, people have been wondering, what the hell is going on?

Shared recently on Slack:

Woke up feeling not too shabby for a 60-year-old. The only problem is I’m still in my 40s.

Going viral on Twitch:

Most people have 32 teeth. Some have 10. Simple meth.

Breaking via Instagram:

Cashier: Did you find everything? Me: Did you hide something?

Home » Funny Call Quotes

157 Funny call quotes

Funny call quotes highlight those awkward and hilarious moments when the phone rings, and chaos (or confusion) follows! 😂📞 Whether it’s dialing the wrong number, getting caught off guard during a call, or saying something you immediately regret, these quotes remind us that phone calls are often more comedy than communication. Here’s to all the funny mix-ups that happen when we pick up the phone! 😆🤦‍♀️☎️

New funny call quotes 👇

3 days ago
Share →: So I got a call from a telemarketer, and he said he couldn’t understand me. I told him, “Press 1 for English.”

Commentary:
When life gives you telemarketers, give them a taste of their own menu! 🤣☎️ Press 1 for a good laugh!
3 days ago
Share →: Just because I’m up sharing posts at 7 a.m. doesn’t mean I’m up. Don’t call my phone.

Commentary:
Still buffering in the morning like a Wi-Fi connection in the basement 😂📱🌛
5 days ago
Share →: Why do they call it a garage sale instead of a garbage sale?

Commentary:
When you find out that your neighbors have been decluttering, not downsizing their trash cans 😂🗑️🚗
5 days ago
Share →: People call me a “Trekkie,” but I’m not. I’ve only seen Star Wars a couple of times.

Commentary:
Boldly going where no 'Trekkie' has gone before… straight into the wrong fandom 🚀🌌😂
5 days ago
Share →: You miss 100% of the gossip from the phone calls you don’t answer.

Commentary:
Is this why my voicemail has been renamed to 'Missed Drama Collection'? 😂📞💬
6 days ago
Share →: If you call me “daddy” in bed, I will immediately stop what we are doing and make you clean your room.

Commentary:
"Guess it's time for some… 'adulting' 🤣🧹🛏️"
7 days ago
Share →: Why does the phone ring longer when you’re ignoring the call?

Commentary:
"Because it's auditioning for a drama series starring 'The Relentless Ringer!' 🎭📞😂"
1 week ago
Share →: I’m the kind of introvert who dodges phone calls but sends paragraphs in texts.

Commentary:
"Why talk when you can type a novel? 📱✍️😆 #SilentButChatty"
2 weeks ago
Share →: The Scream movies were believable in the ’90s, but no one with any common sense answers unknown numbers on their phones anymore.

Commentary:
“Gone are the days when we picked up the phone like we were on a mystery game show! 🤔📞 Now it's more of a 'who's the masked telemarketer?' 🎭😂"
2 weeks ago
Share →: Microsoft Teams needs to add a “spank” reaction for when I want to reprimand my employees during a video call.

Commentary:
"Waiting for the day when Teams introduces the 'virtual karate chop' emoji to keep us all in line! 🥋🙈 #DisciplineInTheDigitalAge"

For even more funny call quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny call quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

730 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,892

Funny Quotes Topics

13,871

Funny Quotes Images

10,892

39 minutes ago

3,435

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇮 has copied:

I’m so old, I still keep special moments in my heart and not in my Insta story.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has copied:

Got out of jury duty yesterday by confessing to the crime.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has bookmarked:

Changing my relationship status from “Single” to “I give up.”

Someone from 🇦🇿 has viewed:

I heard you like bad girls. Well, I’m bad. At everything.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has viewed:

I’m not climbing a hill if I’m dying. That sounds terrible. I’ll die on this chair. Drinking orange Fanta.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has copied:

“Doing the dishes” is completely pointless and only wastes water. You’re just going to put food on them again in a few hours.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has downloaded:

Now that the nights are getting cooler again, spiders often hide in your bed in search of warmth. Sleep well!

Someone from 🇰🇲 has viewed:

Twitter is a prime example why most of us shouldn’t be left unsupervised.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has downloaded:

I hope this email finds you at relative peace with the paradox of existence.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has viewed:

Shoutout to all ladies dating silently without making noise on social media. May God give you another man as a bonus.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Pinterest:

“I asked Grok.” “I asked ChatGPT.” Well, I’ve sacrificed a sheep.

Just landed via Facebook:

I am so incredibly tired today. I think my shelf life has expired.

Seen just now on Instagram:

No one is more surprised than my kids every night when I say it’s bed time.

Trending via Discord:

I really don’t get enough praise for someone who doesn’t need validation from others.

Reported on Telegram:

It’s pretty apt that the ‘i’ is in the middle of ‘hurricane’.

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

Some people call me crazy. I prefer the term happy with a twist.

Freshly posted on Slack:

Imagine you’re on jury duty and the courtroom sketch artist draws stink lines above you.

Spotted on Snapchat:

If you’re riding in my car, that little middle piece is for my elbow — not yours.

Going viral on Messenger:

According to a new study, people who often trail off in the middle of a sentence are 30% more likely to

Just landed via Facebook:

My mom: sure use any towel. Also my mom: not that one.

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