An electric car is just another electric chair.

97 shares on Snapchat this month:

Do cats have a sense of causation between grooming themselves and coughing up hairballs, or do they think it’s just an annoying separate thing which just happens to them sometimes?

38 shares on Facebook this month:

Rewatching Avengers: Age of Ultron. Despite the title, they never tell you how old Ultron is.

76 shares on Instagram this month:

“What’s something you’d tell your younger self?” You can have ice cream for dinner, nobody will stop you.

76 shares on Instagram this month:

Just asked this girl Hannah how she spells her name, and she just said, “Two of everything, darling.” Iconic!

14 shares on Messenger this month:

If reports from this daisy are accurate, she loves me not.

21 shares on Snapchat this month:

You don’t get much engagement? Have you tried being retarded.

86 shares on YouTube this month:

My robot vacuum and I are cut from the same cloth. When we see a line of dirt on the kitchen floor, we just spin around and go the other way.

96 shares on WeChat this month:

Rudolph’s bright red nose would not have done anything to improve Santa’s visibility in dense fog.

61 shares on Instagram this month:

I hate having a ton of anxiety and no energy. It’s like having a tank full of gas and no engine.

27 shares on WhatsApp this month:

My mind is like someone dumped the entire junk drawer on a trampoline.