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Well, nothing says 'I love you' quite like rolling a strike with your heart, right? 🎳💍 Who needs a shiny diamond when you can have a custom bowling ball that perfectly matches your style and helps in knocking down those pins! Let the good times roll! 🎳😄 #RelationshipGoals

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Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I deal with my personal problems the same way I study for tests, I don’t.

1 month ago
avoidance, coping, coping mechanism, humor, mechanism, personal, personal problem, problem, procrastination, study, test
Waking up has backfired on me so many times.

1 month ago
backfire, fatigue, humor, me, morning, morning struggle, relatable, sleep, struggle, times, waking, waking up
Absolute worst time of year to have a secret family. Hands down.

1 month ago
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Marriage is for life. But when that was first said, life was shorter.

1 month ago
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Please leave me alone. I’m just a 3,000-year-old time-traveling alien who is trying to return to his home planet.

1 month ago
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I miss being a kid. Nobody asks what my favorite dinosaur is anymore.

1 month ago
age, being, childhood, childhood memory, dinosaur, favorite, fun, humor, i, kid, memory, miss, nobody, nostalgia

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

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Someone from 🇮🇶 has shared:

I was going to warn my kids about the repercussions of drugs and alcohol until I realized that they in fact were the repercussions of drugs and alcohol.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has bookmarked:

My first thought upon waking up in the morning is “not again”.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has viewed:

I like when I walk with people and they note that I’m a fast walker. We’re in a race. We’re in a race and you’re losing actually.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has viewed:

Why are these idiots only giving robots two arms?

Someone from 🇹🇲 has bookmarked:

Remember the good old days when you didn’t have to wonder if the person messaging you was a bot or not?

Someone from 🇱🇮 has viewed:

Airport security asked me if I’ve seen anything unusual. I just paid $18 for a coke & a sandwich. Let’s start with that.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has viewed:

Having a crush on a girl makes you think things like, yes, let me make more money.

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on LinkedIn:

The hottest I ever look is when I’m brushing my teeth in my underwear, but it’s very much a ‘tree falls in the woods’ situation.

Spotted on YouTube:

38% of being a dad is sitting in a car, looking at your watch, and waiting for everybody else to come out.

Seen just now on Slack:

When someone dies people say “he’s going to meet his Maker”. No he’s not. God doesn’t mingle with the staff.

Making waves on TikTok:

It’d be nice if my bank account filled up as quickly as my laundry basket.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Victor Frankenstein being only 23 years old when he made the monster is crazy to me, he should have been at the club.

Going viral on Discord:

My entire life changed once I found out that a crush is just a lack of information.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Partying hard on this Friday night, and by partying hard, I mean laying on my bed starfish-style.

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Activity Log ✨

Ask your girlfriend for her ring size and then give her a personalized bowling ball.

I deal with my personal problems the same way I study for tests, I don’t.

Waking up has backfired on me so many times.

Absolute worst time of year to have a secret family. Hands down.

Marriage is for life. But when that was first said, life was shorter.

Please leave me alone. I’m just a 3,000-year-old time-traveling alien who is trying to return to his home planet.

I miss being a kid. Nobody asks what my favorite dinosaur is anymore.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

I could tell my beard needed a trim when I started seeing some of the pictures my kids were drawing of me.

I’m gonna put “CEO of Blockbuster Video” on my resume because who are they gonna call to confirm?

I don’t know much about women, but they love containers that hold smaller containers.

I actually think it’s quite beautiful that you have to be the one to save yourself.

I used to have this mental illness, where I thought logical arguments would change someone’s mind.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

It’s called shitposting, Your Honor. You should try it sometimes; it’s liberating.

I don’t believe the phrase “if they wanted to, they would,” because I want to, and I don’t.

Nightmares are so embarrassing. Why is my anxiety working the night shift?

Eating watermelon and minding my own business.

The main reason I got divorced was cause I got married.

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Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

My husband needs a hearing aid, but refuses to get one because it’s the key to our happy marriage.

Jealous that my phone can just die for a little while.

150 years ago, you could just fake your death and go overseas and live a completely different life if you didn’t like the way the cards were originally dealt.

After all the books are banned, they’ll move on to suggestive fruit.

No, baby, I’m not dumping you. I’m just rebranding myself as your ex.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

The lion is starting to concern himself with things he’s been trying to ignore.

If I ever win the lottery and decide to invest in a billboard company, I won’t tell anyone; but there will be signs.

I was not made for a 9 to 5; I was made to eat pasta and lay in the sun like a lizard.

I miss the way I viewed the world before I found out too much about it.

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Ask your girlfriend for her ring size and then give her a personalized bowling ball.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

I deal with my personal problems the same way I study for tests, I don’t.

Waking up has backfired on me so many times.

Absolute worst time of year to have a secret family. Hands down.

Marriage is for life. But when that was first said, life was shorter.

Please leave me alone. I’m just a 3,000-year-old time-traveling alien who is trying to return to his home planet.

I miss being a kid. Nobody asks what my favorite dinosaur is anymore.

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Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

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