Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇷 has viewed:

When I write “I hope this email finds you well” I’m referring to the email’s skills in tracking you down.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has bookmarked:

Just got my test results back and my cholesterol level is a cheese bratwurst.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has copied:

I’m so talented I can not only spill food on my clothes but I can get it on yours too.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has downloaded:

Brains are funny. I can remember every word to a song I haven’t heard in 20 years, but I’ve got no clue what my email password is.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has downloaded:

Adulting is difficult. One minute you’re proud of yourself, the next minute you feel like you’re not doing enough.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has bookmarked:

Sometimes people just need you to be genuine with them, and I personally have no problem pretending to do that.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has shared:

I always work very hard and intensively to ensure that my wife can proudly say: “That idiot over there? Yes, that’s mine!”

Someone from 🇨🇲 has bookmarked:

Every man’s biggest fear is trying a new barber.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has copied:

Petition to change the name of rice cakes to something else as they are 100% rice and 0% cake and I’m tired of all the gaslighting.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has bookmarked:

Bro, did you seriously just forget about Dre?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Dec 31, 2025

3,392

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Messenger:

Sorry for having no idea what the hell I am doing. It will happen again.

Just shared via YouTube:

Parenthood is so crazy. We’re really out here getting bullied by the people we made.

Breaking via WhatsApp:

Changed my bio on bumble to “I’m gonna murder ur whole family” and guys still responded.

Live now on Pinterest:

That depressing moment when you pull up to work and the building is not engulfed in flames.

Just landed via Messenger:

This is the fastest December in the history of all December.

Live now on Instagram:

I caught your husband cheating on you at an Alanis concert, and thought you, you, you oughta know.

Breaking via Messenger:

Starting conversations with short people by saying “back when I was your height…”

Going bananas on Threads:

I set my alarms extra early to make sure I have enough time to lay in bed and be angry about having to wake up.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

“Are we still going?” … An introvert’s attempt to cancel.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

Can’t. Typing a password into a TV.

Ask your girlfriend for her ring size and then give her a personalized bowling ball.

2 months ago

0

Ask your girlfriend for her ring size and then give her a personalized bowling ball.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Well, nothing says 'I love you' quite like rolling a strike with your heart, right? 🎳💍 Who needs a shiny diamond when you can have a custom bowling ball that perfectly matches your style and helps in knocking down those pins! Let the good times roll! 🎳😄 #RelationshipGoals

activity, ask, ball, bowling, bowling ball, fun, fun activity, gift, gift idea, girlfriend, give, humor, idea, personalized, personalized gift, relationship, ring, ring size, size, surprise

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Wouldn’t it be great if we could put ourselves in the dryer and come out wrinkle free?

0

2 months ago

dryer, free, funny thought, great, great idea, humor, idea, put, self-care, thought, wrinkle
Having a kid is so fun when you’re childish, like yeah, it’s my turn with the slime, boo.

0

2 months ago

boo, childish, fun, having, kid, parenthood, playtime, slime, turn
Why insult someone when you can say something nice in a very sarcastic tone?

0

2 months ago

communication, humor, insult, nice, sarcasm, sarcastic, say, someone, something, tone, wit
If I was polyamorous, I think Id date my girlfriend three times.

0

2 months ago

date, girlfriend, humor, i, ID, love, polyamorous, relationship, think, three, times
All these years on the internet we have been working for artificial intelligence.

0

2 months ago

artificial, artificial intelligence, humor, intelligence, internet, technology, work, year
Might start a YouTube channel “will it hurt if I drop it on my foot”.

0

2 months ago

channel, drop, experiment, foot, humor, hurt, i, ideas, pain, start, YouTube

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

64 shares on Facebook this month:

My body is like an elastic band – no matter how I stretch it, it goes back to the nap position.

64 shares on Threads this month:

Go outside and let the rain do what your boyfriend can’t.

75 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Showering at night is so sexy and clean and self-care vibes. Showering in the morning is so productivity core, cog in the machine core.

85 shares on Twitch this month:

I hate when recipes tell you to take something out of the pan and add it back in later. No way bro. It’s staying in there.

28 shares on Reddit this month:

Pronouncing hyperbole like guacamole.

27 shares on Discord this month:

If I win the lottery, I’m buying four politicians and some really nice shoes.

39 shares on Slack this month:

It’s amazing how music can transport you to another place. For example, this coffee shop is playing Justin Bieber, so I’m going to another restaurant.

50 shares on Facebook this month:

I kind of enjoy living in a world where I can end a conversation by simply not texting back.

81 shares on Threads this month:

The best weight you’ll ever lose is the weight of other people’s opinions.

57 shares on WeChat this month:

Ramen is just anime spaghetti.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Can we bring back the lost art of just hanging out at your friends house doing absolutely nothing?

6 folks are currently checking 👀

What you call “Brunch” I call “Breakfast for Alcoholics.”

8 folks are currently checking 👀

If the apple really doesn’t fall far from the tree, my kids are screwed.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Can’t wait for this AI bubble to pop so we can all go back to normal, just like how the internet completely disappeared after the dot-com bubble popped.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

My favourite adult hack is when I carefully and thoughtfully put something very important away so I can’t lose it, and then I never find it again.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

The invention of locks was a key turning point in history.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

I wasn’t feeling well so I googled my symptoms. I either have allergies or I died two days ago.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Work from home ain’t for everyone. I, for one, hate when my coworkers try to message when I’m shopping.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

“Are you single?” No, I’m in a hallucinationship.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

“You let your cat on the bed?” I would put her on my life insurance.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,344

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇭 has downloaded:

I’m so smart, I got rid of cable and now I only have $638 in monthly streaming services.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has downloaded:

To everyone I’ve wronged this year. Next year same time, same place.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has viewed:

Blocking isn’t enough. I wanna throw tomatoes at you like you’re a medieval criminal.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has copied:

Autumn at last. Sitting on the sofa all day with a blanket and tea and watching movies. Just like in summer, but with a blanket and tea.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has copied:

I don’t like who I become when I’m watching someone Google something less efficiently than I would myself.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has copied:

I’ve never met a problem I couldn’t make worse.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has downloaded:

Hug your children as often as you can. They can’t break things during this time.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has shared:

A girl can casually just say something, and you already know you’re not going to date or marry her.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has shared:

“There’s a particular type of insufferability that rich people from poor countries have, that I don’t yet fully know how to verbalize.”

Someone from 🇸🇬 has copied:

Girls Just Want To Have Naan

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Telegram:

Shoutout to the friends that still like me. All two of you.

Going viral on YouTube:

As a simulation, this all kinda sucks.

Just landed via Telegram:

The person who invented butter really understood humans.

Seen just now on TikTok:

Absolutely love wanting to do a lot of things and ending up not doing even one! Yay.

Making waves on X:

House sitting for friends while they’re out of town. Never knew my buddy kept a diary.

Shared recently on X:

“The only thing standing between you and your dreams is you!” Yeah, have you met me? That’s gonna be a problem.

Seen just now on Threads:

I wish people had mute buttons in real life.

Making waves on Discord:

In my 20’s: might hit the club tonight. In my 40’s: might go to the grocery store to listen to some bangers.

Breaking via Threads:

I would go out more if there weren’t any humans out there.

Going viral on Instagram:

“You handled it so well.” Nah, I didn’t. I lost my spark, felt crazy, distanced myself from everyone, and hated myself.

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