52 funny girlfriend quotes - Wordgag

Asking my girlfriend if I can go outside to play in the yard.

May 31, 2026May 31, 2026

My gf doesn’t really like it when I talk about my ex, which means I now have a lot of stories from college where I’m just alone for some reason.

May 30, 2026

Having a girlfriend is insane because you can literally text them, and they will respond.

May 30, 2026

My parents grew to like my girlfriend so much, they take her as their own daughter. Now they started looking for a proper boyfriend for her.

May 30, 2026

Hey Grok, scan through all my mutuals and find me a girlfriend, thanks!

May 30, 2026

My girlfriend? You wouldn’t know her, she’s in a different data center.

May 30, 2026

How do couples who live together get anything done? I wouldn’t leave my bed if my girlfriend was in it.

May 29, 2026

Commenting “This could be us” on her pics with her boyfriend.

May 29, 2026

Toxic girlfriend who goes through her boyfriend’s calculator app and asks why he’s doing the equations he’s doing.

May 29, 2026

Having a girlfriend who doesn’t post herself on social media is an underrated blessing.

May 29, 2026

Once this pandemic ends, I’m legit quitting video games and getting a girlfriend for real.

May 29, 2026

As funny as it sounds, the easiest way to get women is by having a girlfriend.

May 29, 2026

Spotify Wrapped? Next year, maybe you should try to be in the top .05% of listeners to your girlfriend.

May 29, 2026

If I had a tiny girlfriend, I would love to throw her across gaps so she can pull levers and open doors that get me to her part of the level.

May 29, 2026

Just let your girlfriend be crazy, like who cares, bro.

May 28, 2026

I once had a psychic girlfriend, she left me before we met.

May 28, 2026

My girlfriend confided in me she loves when I blow air on her when she’s hot, but honestly, I’m not a fan.

May 28, 2026

Your first non-broke girlfriend will change your whole perspective about relationships.

May 28, 2026

My girlfriend treats me like a god. She ignores my existence and only talks to me when she needs something.

May 27, 2026

Some woman is out there right now, pregnant with Leonardo DiCaprio’s next girlfriend.

May 27, 2026

The ideal girlfriend breaks your heart, so you go on to do great things.

May 27, 2026

My girlfriend just had a go at me for not glistening, whatever that is.

May 27, 2026

Thinking about quitting my job to focus on my girlfriend.

May 26, 2026

I didn’t lose a girlfriend, I gained an enemy.

May 26, 2026

People have ex girlfriends, I have ex crushes.

May 26, 2026

Everybody has a girlfriend and a boyfriend, and I’m over here like “I love food”.

May 25, 2026

I hated rats even before my girlfriend left me for one.

May 25, 2026

If I was polyamorous, I think Id date my girlfriend three times.

May 24, 2026

Girlfriend is temporary, ex-girlfriend is forever.

May 24, 2026

Forget Spotify Wrapped. How many minutes did you spend listening to your girlfriend this year?

May 24, 2026

I want a girlfriend so hot that people walking down the street know that I am funny.

May 24, 2026

Hello, boyfriend? It’s me, girlfriend, from dating?

May 23, 2026

I totally get why Leonardo DiCaprio is trying to save the environment for future generations. They could be his girlfriend.

May 23, 2026

Most guys probably just have a foot fetish because their first girlfriend was a sock.

May 23, 2026

Horrifying if literal: my girlfriend is a gym rat.

May 23, 2026

My girlfriend wants us to try couples counseling and I said we should use my therapist because he already knows what’s wrong with her.

May 22, 2026

Only after moving in together do you realize your girlfriend’s little quirks. Mine, for example, stores vegetables in the beer compartment.

May 22, 2026

Worst feeling in the world is when you are loyal to all your girlfriends but your favorite one is cheating on you.

May 22, 2026

Ask your girlfriend for her ring size and then give her a personalized bowling ball.

May 22, 2026

Your girlfriend needs two hours to get ready. But if you don’t have your shoes on when she’s ready, you’re the problem.

May 21, 2026