Due to foreseen circumstances well within my control I will be late.

Commentary:
"Ah, the timeless art of procrastination! šŸ˜„ Why be early when you can make a stylish entrance, right? ā°šŸ•°ļø Just blame it on the 'foreseen circumstances' – aka hitting the snooze button a few too many times! šŸ›ŒšŸ’¤ #FashionablyLate"