Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇹 has viewed:

Unknown numbers will call me, then expect me to talk first. Welcome to the breathing competition.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has downloaded:

I’m just a girl looking for another snack.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has viewed:

Muting morons is good for your health.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has downloaded:

Monday has a personal vendetta against my happiness.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has viewed:

Not to brag, but I’ve done nothing for several hours.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has shared:

I hope we get the nice AI that enslaves us and makes us their pets and not the bad AI that enslaves us to mine lithium or something.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has shared:

Thinking about quitting my job to focus on my girlfriend.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has copied:

Surely, this is the hangover that will teach me my lesson.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has bookmarked:

Sometimes I do random acts of kindness, like keeping my mouth shut, for example.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has viewed:

The web is the only place where you encourage strangers to follow you. What could possibly go wrong?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Dec 31, 2025

3,596

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Girls won’t admit it, but they don’t like super fine dudes; they like medium ugly, funny dudes that dress nice.

Going viral on Telegram:

Pepsi & Coca-Cola can’t even be in the same restaurant… and we want world peace.

Breaking via Facebook:

Want to lose weight for the summer? Don’t worry, just check in your luggage at the airport. You’ll never see those pounds again.

Going viral on YouTube:

“You are what you eat”. I don’t remember eating a huge disappointment.

Just landed via Threads:

“I’m too young to be forgetting why I walked into a room.”

Going bananas on Facebook:

The man who invented autocorrect walks into a barn. He orders a bear.

Trending via Twitch:

Sorry I’m unavailable… the horrors of reality insist upon themselves.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

If I like cleaning? Does Sisyphus like his boulder?

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Don’t throw hate at me, throw money!

Shared recently on X:

Most of Twitter could probably use a good bop on the nose with a rolled-up newspaper.

36 Funny invent quotes

Funny invent quotes 🤖💡 spark creativity with a twist of humor! Whether you’re a mad scientist or just love clever thinking, these witty lines will tickle your brain and inspire your next big idea. Ready to laugh and invent at the same time? Let’s dive into some clever wordplay that proves innovation doesn’t have to be serious! 😂✨

New funny invent quotes 👇

They should invent a brain that doesn’t whisper bad things to you.

0

3 days ago

bad, brain, humor, inner, inner voice, invent, invention, mind, negative, negative thought, self-talk, should, things, thought, voice, whisper
They should invent a Twitter where the timeline doesn’t refresh against your will.

0

3 days ago

app, experience, frustration, invent, invention, media, refresh, should, social, social media, technology, timeline, Twitter, user, user experience, where
They should invent harmless cigarettes for aura farming purposes.

0

2 months ago

aura, aura farming, cigarette, cigarettes, farming, harmless, humor, invent, invention, should
They should invent a food that sounds good for dinner tonight.

0

2 months ago

craving, dinner, food, good, humor, invent, invention, meal, should, sounds, tonight
They should invent crushes that like you back.

0

2 months ago

back, cru, crush, dating, humor, invent, invention, love, relationship, should, unrequited, unrequited love
They should invent a small lifestyle change that has an instantaneous, huge payoff.

0

2 months ago

change, huge, humor, improvement, instant, instant payoff, invent, lifestyle, lifestyle change, motivation, payoff, self, self-improvement, should, small, thinking, wishful, wishful thinking
Mothers will invent chores just to be mad you’re not doing them too.

0

2 months ago

anger, chore, chores, doing, family, humor, invent, just, mad, mother, too
Not having a crush is dangerous. What am I supposed to think about? What if I invent something?

0

2 months ago

am, boredom, creativity, crush, danger, dangerous, funny thought, having, humor, i, imagination, invent, loneliness, something, think, thought
Instead of those cute mini pizzas, they should invent gigantic ones that take four people to carry.

0

2 months ago

activity, appetite, carry, craving, cute, exaggeration, food, fun, fun activity, humor, invent, joke, mini, people, pizza, should, take
They should invent a situationship that turns into something beautiful.

0

2 months ago

beautiful, companionship, dating, emotional, emotional growth, growth, humor, invent, love, relationship, romance, should, situationship, something

For even more funny invent quotes, hit next 👇

All funny invent quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

90 shares on Pinterest this month:

Menstruation is bizarre. It’s like something David Lynch would have came up with.

34 shares on Discord this month:

Unfortunately, I have the paper towel habit of a much wealthier man.

72 shares on Instagram this month:

Unless you’re dead wearing a sheet, you got no business ghosting people.

87 shares on Messenger this month:

“My reading glasses would look good on your nightstand.” -Me, flirting.

94 shares on Facebook this month:

Don’t drink to forget me, you’ll end up seeing me double.

23 shares on Messenger this month:

I don’t know who needs to hear this, but your clothes are still in the washing machine.

54 shares on Twitch this month:

Baby for sale. Refuses to wear shoes.

99 shares on Slack this month:

My patience is like a gift card, not sure how much is left but lets give it a try.

38 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go.

81 shares on Facebook this month:

Millennials aren’t having kids because no one’s made lo-fi hip-hop beats to yell at your kids to.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

22 folks are currently checking 👀

I hate it when I’m gossiping at work and a customer wants to be served. How rude is that?

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Everyone’s an expert after the fact.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Vegetables are actually pretty good when they’re fried.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

No camera can do justice to a landscape that melts your heart.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Never miss a good chance to shut up.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Of course I stay hydrated. Carbohydrated.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m not “late”, I’m just very creative with my interpretation of “time”.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

We must all do our part for the planet. The other day I unplugged a row of electric cars nobody was using.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

I am a fool everyday, I don’t need a holiday for it.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

I offered my nephew a donut and he said “no thanks, I’m not hungry right now” and I don’t think this little guy knows how donuts work.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,492

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇿 has viewed:

If we were both crows, I’d bring you shiny things.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has bookmarked:

Not to brag but I don’t even need meditation, my mind goes blank the second someone asks me for directions.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has downloaded:

You know it’s bad when people start telling you, you are the strongest person they’ve ever met.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has bookmarked:

Everyone’s a gangster until they have to say sorry.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has viewed:

Am simultaneously the family’s black sheep and gold star, and that’s exactly why I’m the way I am.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has bookmarked:

Uber sends notifications like “Hey, want to take an Uber right now?” No thanks, buddy. It’s more for when I need to go somewhere.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has bookmarked:

Confuse your doctor by putting on rubber gloves while he does.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has shared:

I might look like I have my life together, but that’s only because the mess is out of the camera frame.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has shared:

Math is like Chinese to me.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has shared:

Great minds think alike. Unfortunately, so do stupid ones.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Facebook:

Eating healthy requires a second job.

Trending via Snapchat:

There’s two sides to every story, and then there’s these screenshots I got.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

I never feel more alone than when I’m trying to put sunscreen on my back.

Breaking via Slack:

How is rent for 28 days the same amount as for 31 days? Where is my change?

Trending via TikTok:

The concept of a drive-by doesn’t really exist in the swamp biome; instead, people rap about doing bog-emerges.

Making waves on Discord:

My account is fake, I’m actually your probation officer.

Breaking via Snapchat:

I could never abuse substances, they mean a lot to me.

Breaking via X:

Fitbits are just Tamagotchis, except the stupid animal you’re trying to keep alive is you.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

I need to be more disciplined and stop procrastinating, starting tomorrow.

Spotted on Telegram:

Confidence is 10% work and 90% delusion.

© 2025. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴