Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • Elections make you feel like we’re all in divorce court waiting to see who gets custody of us.
  • “What’s wrong with you?” Right now or in general?
  • My daughter asked me what it’s like to be a parent, so I woke her up at 3 AM to let her know that I couldn’t sleep.
  • Having to pee when you’re driving is problematic. Having to sneeze when you’re driving is even more problematic.
  • If I were God, I’d tell everyone that I created the animals and that I don’t know what happened after that.
  • Icarus loved hot wings.