115 funny hell quotes - Wordgag

Microdosing hell by being aware and literate.

Jun 2, 2026Jun 2, 2026

You get your hands on a real serious pair of scissors and wonder what the hell they were doing with the regular ones.

May 30, 2026

Being liked at work comes with so many perks, you could be late as hell, and everyone is just happy to see you.

May 30, 2026

Dear Apple, at no point will I ever text someone “he’ll yeah” ..

May 30, 2026

Every time I ask my husband to bring me something out of my purse, without a doubt, he’ll bring me my whole purse. Why are purses so scary to men, lol.

May 30, 2026

This post is invisible, and only those going to Hell can see it.

May 30, 2026

Me, after skipping the tutorial: how the hell do you play this game?

May 30, 2026

If we’ve got the technology to make heated car seats, then where the hell are the seats that automatically cool down in the summer? Make it happen, nerds.

May 30, 2026

Walmart was wild as hell today, so I fit right in.

May 30, 2026

Who the hell keeps letting it be Monday again?

May 30, 2026

Micro dosing hell by staying informed and educated.

May 29, 2026

There is a special place reserved in hell for website designers who disable cut and paste in password fields.

May 29, 2026

Why will Satan torture people in hell for disobeying the same God he disobeyed?

May 29, 2026

The funniest thing about 28 Years Later is that the rest of the world just went “Uhm, anyway!” and carried on as normal, while the Brits live in hell.

May 29, 2026

Women will be like “I know a spot,” and then take you directly to hell.

May 29, 2026

Cops wake up Christmas morning excited as hell to ignore their family and go sit on the highway with a radar gun for 10 hours.

May 29, 2026

Imagine going to see a situationship in 1868, and you go outside, and your horse is dead as hell.

May 29, 2026

Maybe I died of Covid in 2020, and this is hell.

May 29, 2026

Can’t believe I spent so many years of my life asking teachers if I was allowed to use the bathroom, and sometimes be told no. What the hell?

May 29, 2026

Me in hell: “So did it hurt when you fell from heaven.” Lucifer: “Get out!”

May 29, 2026

If we’re living in a dystopian nightmare, where the hell is my housekeeping robot?

May 29, 2026

I’m pretending to be a hot girl on Tinder so I can match with my roommate and tell him I’m coming over, so he’ll clean the apartment.

May 28, 2026

Billionaires are so weird. What are you saving up for? Hell?

May 28, 2026

In Hell, “Cotton Eye Joe” plays on an eternal loop. The heat and fire are actually pleasant compared to that.

May 28, 2026

Hotel elevators are hell for those of us who are small-talk failures. The guy asked me, “You just get in today too?” and I said, “Well, no,” then stood in silence.

May 28, 2026

I literally never want to be the bigger person again. We can both go to hell.

May 28, 2026

Clearly, hell is empty, the demons are all here.

May 28, 2026

Wait… if you’re circling back and I’m touching base, who the hell is monitoring the situation?

May 28, 2026

Not to be a nerd, but a well-placed semicolon is hot as hell.

May 28, 2026

There should be an Olympics where athletes can take as many drugs as they want. Like, to hell with y’all, let’s see how high humans can really jump.

May 28, 2026

Sorry for having no idea what the hell I am doing. It will happen again.

May 28, 2026

I love when my Uber driver and I both shut the hell up for a full ride.

May 28, 2026

This heat made me realize I won’t survive in hell, I gotta change.

May 28, 2026

Why the hell did they name them ‘Soldier ants’ and not ‘Combatants’?

May 28, 2026

Did you know if you hold your ear up to a stranger’s leg, you can actually hear them say, ‘What the hell are you doing?’

May 28, 2026

I wanna be a villain so I can just saunter everywhere. The heroes are always sprinting, always running. You ever seen Darth Vader run? Hell no. And I ain’t about to either.

May 28, 2026

Microdosing hell by checking the web every day.

May 28, 2026

I wonder how many people think, “What the hell?” after talking to me.

May 28, 2026

Got my dog microchipped, so if he runs away, I can just press a button, and he’ll explode.

May 27, 2026

The first person to ever throw up was probably like, “Ok, what the hell.”

May 27, 2026