611 funny know quotes - Wordgag

I’m trying to be less condescending. I bet you don’t even know what that means.

May 30, 2026May 30, 2026

Just in case you don’t know, it’s “piqued” your interest, not “peaked”.

May 30, 2026

I know Jesus was a carpenter, but I think he would’ve been a better plumber, you know, with the water thing.

May 30, 2026

Maybe Monday is more scared of us than we are of it… we don’t know.

May 30, 2026

Please be nice to me. I’m in my twenties. Do you know what that does to a person?

May 30, 2026

Every time I want to use a big word that I just know the meaning of, I Google it first, just in case.

May 30, 2026

You know when you tap a video to see how long it’s got left? I wish you could do that to people while they’re talking.

May 30, 2026

I don’t know who needs to hear this, but that much caffeine can’t be good for you.

May 30, 2026

Everyone is fighting a battle you don’t know about, except for me. I am complaining loudly about my battle. Everybody knows about it.

May 30, 2026

You relax for 15 minutes after work, and next thing you know, it’s 10 p.m.

May 30, 2026

I don’t know much about women, but they love containers that hold smaller containers.

May 30, 2026

A lot of men actually do forgive cheating, as long as their homies don’t know.

May 30, 2026

When I’m not posting or returning messages, just know that I’m probably out doing superhero shit.

May 30, 2026

I don’t know who needs to hear this, but your dog can stay home for the hour you’re at the grocery store or restaurant.

May 30, 2026

If you’re happy and you know it, you’re clearly not paying enough attention.

May 30, 2026

Does my career know that I’m pursuing it, or is it another one-sided relationship?

May 30, 2026

I don’t know what millennial needs to hear this, but throw away the box your phone came in. You don’t need it. You will never need it.

May 30, 2026

You know you’re over 50 when you have “upstairs Ibuprofen” and “downstairs Ibuprofen”.

May 30, 2026

The first thing you need to know about social media is that everyone’s on vacation, except for you.

May 30, 2026

Your card declining when you know you have money is a very funny experience.

May 30, 2026

“There’s a particular type of insufferability that rich people from poor countries have, that I don’t yet fully know how to verbalize.”

May 30, 2026

My ex was like “I know a spot,” then took me to the lowest point in my life.

May 30, 2026

Not gonna lie, to this day, I don’t know the difference between gray and grey, I just wing it.

May 30, 2026

The younger generation will never know the fear and anxiety of calling your friend’s house, and their parents answer the phone.

May 30, 2026

Kinda worried about something. Don’t know what it is yet.

May 30, 2026

My favorite thing to do when I see people I know in public is to pretend I didn’t.

May 30, 2026

I think social media is marvellous. You type your thoughts into it, and then insane people let you know if they like them or not.

May 30, 2026

Nudes are outdated. Send me a video of you reading out loud so I know you’re not dumb.

May 30, 2026

After smartphones, we never got pictures of Bigfoot anymore. You know why? That’s right: 5G killed all the Bigfoots.

May 30, 2026

I’ve started rejecting all cookies instead of accepting them. I don’t even know what it means, but I’ve had enough.

May 30, 2026

Welcome to your 40s. A random back pain will be assigned to you shortly, and you’ll never know what flares it up every time.

May 30, 2026

You can’t confuse me. I already don’t know what’s going on.

May 30, 2026

Anyone else get excited about going to bed because you know there’ll be coffee in the morning, or is that just me?

May 30, 2026

When you split a dessert, the waiter should bring two forks and one of those chess clocks you smack to let the other person know it’s their turn.

May 30, 2026

A girl can casually just say something, and you already know you’re not going to date or marry her.

May 30, 2026

I don’t know how to flirt, but you can watch me eat fresh fruit in my sundress.

May 30, 2026

You know how a dog tilts his head and looks confused when he hears a strange sound? Yeah, that’s how I feel when some people are talking.

May 30, 2026

I do not know how to put this gently, but part of being a good driver is using the gas and brake as little as humanly possible.

May 30, 2026

I caught your husband cheating on you at an Alanis concert, and thought you, you, you oughta know.

May 30, 2026

I’ve got 99 problems. I know this because I wake up in the middle of the night to review each and every one of them in great detail.

May 30, 2026