I hope you all get laid soon, for your own mental health.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has bookmarked:

Nothing like a grandfather clock to remind you every hour that you’re still awake.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has viewed:

When I get to work, I always hide first, because a good worker is always hard to find.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has downloaded:

I don’t really care how you met your partner. Tell me about how you met your nemesis.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has viewed:

Like a fine bourbon, we get better with age. Or, at least, … we feel better about our age after drinking lots of bourbon!

Someone from 🇱🇺 has copied:

There should be a Jaws sequel where the shark finally gets arrested for his crimes and goes to jail.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has bookmarked:

Can’t, too busy deleting screenshots of my lock screen.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has copied:

Phone so dry, I caught myself checking the weather.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has downloaded:

Spotify has got it all wrong, the hottest single of the year is me.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has bookmarked:

I was going to buy my wife a car for Christmas but then I remembered I don’t live in a commercial.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has viewed:

There aren’t any emojis that really express any meaningful sort of anguish.