Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇪 has copied:

“Male loneliness epidemic” and it’s just karma and the consequences of their actions.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has downloaded:

Whoever named the meatball absolutely nailed it.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has bookmarked:

Made a lot of mistakes in my life, but adding more cheese than a recipe calls for isn’t one of them.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has viewed:

I got bills. They’re multiplying.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has downloaded:

To me, essential oils are what drips out of tacos.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has viewed:

November is for turtlenecks and depression.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has copied:

Our house is so messy that if we ever disappeared, the police would have no idea if there were “signs of a struggle”.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has bookmarked:

I might be late to a lot of places, but the airport is not one of them.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has downloaded:

Absolutely no reason for a single guy to be in a sunflower field. Get out of there, pervert!

Someone from 🇦🇱 has shared:

I’d like to have a word with the groundhog before he starts working this year.

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

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17,766

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15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

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Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Telegram:

I’m the ick in fantastic.

Making waves on Discord:

I love making the whole conversation so awkward that the most anyone can say after is “so yeah…”

Making waves on Instagram:

You gotta wonder why they just don’t make all bread garlic bread.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

As someone with OCD, I can’t help but respect how Pringles are just like, no, this is the order you must eat them in.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

I was googling about the best time to visit the Maldives. It’s when you have money.

Making waves on X:

Having an exorcism, but only because the demon requested it.

Trending via Snapchat:

Inside you, there are two wolves. Kevin Costner is dancing with both of them. I don’t know how this works.

Making waves on X:

The only thing that could possibly put a smile on my face is a Sharpie.

Seen just now on Telegram:

My favorite genre of tweet is conservative guy asking Grok, ‘Is this true?’ and then arguing with it when it doesn’t give him the answer he likes.

I just wanna be rich enough to not have to run onstage after concerts to get my bra back.

2 weeks ago

Funny Quotes

Witty quote about wealth and stage antics, highlighting humorous backstage frustrations.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Because let's face it, chasing after your own bra is not the glamorous encore anyone wants to witness 🎤💸 #RichPeopleProblems"

aspiration, back, bra, concert, fame, humor, i, just, onstage, performance, rich, run

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Social Media Stars ⭐

17 shares on YouTube this month:

Toys R Us went out of business because their mascot was a stupid giraffe when it could’ve been a toy dinosaur called the Toysaurus. It was right there man.

76 shares on YouTube this month:

Meatloaf is a good safe word. It means I would do anything for love, but I won’t do that…

89 shares on Messenger this month:

I have 206 bones, 650 muscles and 50 billion cells in my body. It takes time to wake up all of them up in the morning.

60 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Girls are happier when their dress has pockets, it’s science.

38 shares on WeChat this month:

You can’t keep running away from your problems, you’re getting older and your kids are getting faster.

53 shares on Snapchat this month:

Funny that all this nonsense just stayed in people’s heads before Twitter came along.

82 shares on Reddit this month:

I don’t have a welcome mat at my front door because I’m not a liar.

57 shares on YouTube this month:

My employer is totally caring. They pay so poorly that I can’t afford to have an alcohol or drug problem.

40 shares on Facebook this month:

Euthanizing my Tamagotchi.

62 shares on Instagram this month:

I’m busy watching the vegan couple next door arguing about the Big Mac wrapper I hid in their trash can.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇾 has bookmarked:

As everyone was arguing about politics, no one saw me leave with the cake.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has copied:

Does the HDMI cord have the most dominant run of any cord ever?

Someone from 🇯🇴 has viewed:

The ‘b’ in ‘subtle’ totally is.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has copied:

Elections is like waiting for the results of a biopsy, except half your family hopes it’s cancer.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has bookmarked:

I got so lost there for a minute (several years).

Someone from 🇦🇱 has viewed:

I’m pretty sure I fall under the percentage of people who’ve eaten the sticker on the apple.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has copied:

Jeez. It’s like the people in this nursing home have never heard techno before.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has bookmarked:

At my age, this “microsleep” can sometimes last hours.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has viewed:

The Christmas tree I’ve had up all year makes a lot more sense now.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has bookmarked:

I’m either at work, going to work, coming home from work, getting ready for work, getting some sleep for work, or thinking about not wanting to go to work.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on LinkedIn:

Before you beef with me, just know I’m deeply malicious to my core once upset.

Trending via Twitch:

Doggystyle, so we can both look at the river.

Spotted on Threads:

Hangman is so great. No better way for a child to learn how to spell than by having to save a man from hanging to death.

Just shared via Threads:

You’re my least favourite notification.

Freshly posted on Slack:

I’m far too underqualified for adult life, and I feel like I was promoted to manager far too quickly.

Broadcasted on YouTube:

Went to HR to complain about my coworkers but my mom said she can’t fire my kids.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Making fun of bands that only play 3 chords when I don’t even know what a chord is.

Seen just now on Slack:

I just sneezed next to my computer and the anti-virus popped up.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

So many songs that tell you to throw your hands in the air like you just don’t care, so few about the hazards of ceiling fans.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

This too shall pass, but what the hell?

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Activity Log ✨

I just wanna be rich enough to not have to run onstage after concerts to get my bra back.

Haunted Houses this year are just gonna have the news on.

I’m broke in Monopoly, and my husband just asked if I want to earn $100.

Remember when we had to smack the TV cause it wasn’t coming in clearly? I feel that way about too many people.

Our neighbor complained that our cat is always running through his garden. My father said: “Okay, I’ll tell her.”

I’m so single, I have no one to drunk text.

The concept of dominant hands is hilarious to me. That one of our hands is just like, “No, I’m not helping.”

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Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I just wanna be rich enough to not have to run onstage after concerts to get my bra back.

Keep the laugh going 😂

Haunted Houses this year are just gonna have the news on.

I’m broke in Monopoly, and my husband just asked if I want to earn $100.

Remember when we had to smack the TV cause it wasn’t coming in clearly? I feel that way about too many people.

Our neighbor complained that our cat is always running through his garden. My father said: “Okay, I’ll tell her.”

I’m so single, I have no one to drunk text.

The concept of dominant hands is hilarious to me. That one of our hands is just like, “No, I’m not helping.”

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨