Yeah, I’ll get up soon, I just need to look at the internet first. Yes, the whole thing.

Yeah, I’ll get up soon, I just need to look at the internet first. Yes, the whole thing.

Commentary:
“Just one quick peek at the internet… said every person ever, before embarking on an epic journey down the endless rabbit hole of cat videos, memes, and conspiracy theories. 🌐😂 #ProcrastinationGoals”

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Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • The word aerobics comes from two Greek words: aero, meaning “ability to,” and bics, meaning “withstand tremedous boredom.”

    Commentary:
    Ah, the clever origins of the word “aerobics” reveal the true essence of the workout – the ability to withstand tremendous boredom while getting in shape! It’s a true test of mental fortitude to endure those repetitive movements and cheesy workout music. Who knew the ancient Greeks were also masters of sarcasm and wit when it came to fitness terminology!

  • You can pronounce it “Nude Jersey” and no one will know.

    Commentary:
    “Ah, the elusive ‘Nude Jersey’ – a hidden gem, known only to the initiated 😏🔍 So that’s the secret pronunciation code, huh? Watch out, New Jersey, you’re about to get a whole lot more mysterious! 🤫🔮”

  • The evening news: Where they begin with “Good evening” and then proceed to tell you why it’s not.

    Commentary:
    “Breaking News: The evening news – where they kick off with a paradoxical ‘Good evening’ and then shatter your optimism with a spectacle of doom and gloom! 🌆📺😅 #MediaIrony”

  • Please, Tinder, add AI to your app. I don’t want to be involved in the modern dating experience. Let a robot do it for me. Let the machines suffer in our place.

    Commentary:
    “Who needs love when you have artificial intelligence to swipe right for you? 🤖💔 Let the robots deal with our messy dating lives while we sit back and enjoy the show from a safe distance. It’s a match made in tech heaven! 😂🤖 #RobotLove”

  • Who you are before you have your coffee is the real you.

    Commentary:
    “Before coffee: a mysterious blend of grumpy, confused, and not-to-be-disturbed… After coffee: a powerhouse of charm, wit, and productivity! ☕️😄 Embrace the transformation – caffeine is the real magic potion!”

  • Having Twitter is just like reading the newspaper, except the newspaper is on fire and all the writers hate you.

    Commentary:
    “Having Twitter is like reading the newspaper, but instead of news, it’s a chaotic bonfire of opinions where the writers are just waiting to roast you 🔥📰😅 #TwitterverseDrama”