I want whatever the people who run at 6 a.m. have. Posted onMar 31, 2026 by slickboy in Funny Quotes 💾 Save Image Commentary:I suspect it's just coffee with a hint of magic potion! ☕✨🏃♂️ Related funny posts 🤝 Who you are before you have your coffee is the real you. So many true crime podcasts are just like “a young woman went missing, the police took a week to respond, she was last seen with a man the community call Creepy Steve, he has never been questioned” I’m just falling in love with my problems now. Maybe they’ll leave me too. My morning coffee makes me feel like I’ve got my shit together. I don’t, but it makes me feel like I do. Coffee doesn’t even work on me anymore. I just drink it because the taste tricks my brain into thinking I’m a functioning adult.