Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇦 has viewed:

Studies show that people with high IQs tend to be lazy, or something like that. I didn’t read the whole article.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has viewed:

It always takes me an hour to get ready. 45 minutes for doing nothing and 15 hectic minutes for the rest.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has downloaded:

I have this ability where I can look at someone’s profile picture and determine whether they are evil or not.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has viewed:

Washing my hands in the sink and then wiping them on my cat, like a towel.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has downloaded:

We really grew up in the best era to be a kid, and the worst era to be an adult.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has viewed:

They should invent a political party that doesn’t suck.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has bookmarked:

I think this man might be the one, I say right before he dumps me and I never hear from him again.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has viewed:

I dropped and broke my phone today. Hurt more than childbirth!

Someone from 🇴🇲 has bookmarked:

I’m glad it’s not snowing. I can’t imagine shoveling snow in this heat.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has downloaded:

Seriously, how sexy was Freud’s mom?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,335

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on TikTok:

Stop blaming others for your mistakes. Study Feng Shui and blame the furniture.

Making waves on YouTube:

Twitter is fun because you can post a pic of pizza and people will get mad at you.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Doing dishes is like fighting a hydra — wash one, and two more appear.

Broadcasted on WeChat:

Don’t mispronounce anything next to me and think I didn’t hear it.

Shared recently on Twitch:

Sharks are orcs, dolphins are elves.

Making waves on Instagram:

I was guest-starring on The Love Boat when you woke me up. You’re dead to me.

Going viral on Snapchat:

Just went to the Oreo website and hit “accept all cookies” … and now we wait.

Making waves on Messenger:

The feminine urge to start a coven.

Spreading quickly via Pinterest:

No pre-workout, just flashbacks of stuff I let slide.

Trending via Reddit:

“Don’t judge a book by its cover” is a beautiful, powerful sentiment that I fully ignore when book shopping.

I wonder if people who spend all their time screaming on the internet know there are way more fun things to do.

3 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Screaming on the internet: the cardio workout you never knew you signed up for! 🎤🤯🏋️‍♀️

activity, fun, i, internet, know, people, scream, screaming, spend, things, time, wonder

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Dating apps? No thanks, if I wanted to talk to someone for hours and accomplish nothing, I’d contact tech support.

0

2 months ago

accomplish, apps, communication, contact, dating, frustration, hours, humor, i, ID, nothing, relationship, someone, support, talk, tech, thanks, wanted
My biggest fear about becoming a zombie is all the walking.

0

2 months ago

apocalypse, fear, humor, undead, walking, zombie
Wife is temporary. Being the hot EX is forever.

0

2 months ago

being, breakup, dating, ex, forever, hot, humor, marriage, relationships, temporary, wife
Dating someone from Twitter is like believing a stripper loves you.

0

3 months ago

dating, humor, love, relationship, sarcasm, someone, stripper, Twitter
A beaver is an otter that has studied architecture.

0

2 months ago

animal, architecture, beaver, humor, otter, study
Isn’t it weird we have a little voice in our head, like the one you’re using to read this?

0

2 months ago

cognitive, funny thought, head, health, humor, inner, inner voice, introspection, little, mental, mental health, mind, quirky, read, self-awareness, thought, using, voice, weird

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

12 shares on TikTok this month:

Sleeping in now means waking up without the alarm clock, but still at the same time.

21 shares on YouTube this month:

Don’t let the fact that I’m deeply unserious distract you from the fact that you’re in the presence of a genius.

21 shares on Twitch this month:

Please do not ask a bookworm if they are going to finish the books they have before buying more. It is very offensive in our culture.

46 shares on WeChat this month:

That moment when you’ve gone through Insta, Facebook, X and the new emails and you know you should start working now. Luckily, there’s YouTube.

70 shares on WeChat this month:

“Your sock has a hole in it!” Yeah, no shit, that’s how I get my foot in there.

62 shares on Instagram this month:

The more nicknames I have for you, the more I like you.

51 shares on Snapchat this month:

How do they know an animal is extinct? Like, have you really looked everywhere?

72 shares on Slack this month:

A chocolate advent calendar is a test of restraint that I simply do not have.

50 shares on Reddit this month:

I’ve faced more peer pressure to watch certain TV shows than to do drugs.

74 shares on Reddit this month:

Pilots lowkey have an aura when they walk past you in the airport.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇮 has downloaded:

These days I just accept the website cookies without any protest. Website is like Grandma, I’m not gonna fight with you.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has downloaded:

Beer is like the color black: it goes with everything.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has shared:

We got the Christmas tree yesterday, and now my wife knows that I was the chief architect working on the leaning tower of Pisa.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has viewed:

Just as “magic spells” use special rhymes and archaic terms to signal their power, the convoluted language of legalese acts to convey a sense of authority.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has copied:

I’m not here to offend anyone; I’m here to offend everyone.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has viewed:

Lost my Thesaurus. Gutted. Really gutted. Like absolutely gutted.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has shared:

Some things are better left unsaid, which I usually realize after I say them.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has downloaded:

Can we normalize arguing with little kids? They’re so rude.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has downloaded:

No show does a misunderstanding / miscommunication plot better than Modern Family does.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has downloaded:

The sexual orientation where you’re attracted to both and men and women but they’re not attracted to you is called Bi-yourself.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via WhatsApp:

I’ve started rejecting all cookies instead of accepting them. I don’t even know what it means, but I’ve had enough.

Broadcasted on Facebook:

I wish other jobs let us solve issues by releasing diss tracks. Got some sick rhymes about Debbie from accounting and her poorly structured invoicing.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

You are only young once. After that you have to think up some other excuse.

Breaking via Pinterest:

Without freedom of speech we wouldn’t know who the idiots are.

Shared recently on Telegram:

I enjoy long walks in the woods, but only because there’s a chance I’ll get eaten by a bear.

Spotted on TikTok:

People who work in retail should be allowed to slap a customer or two each Christmas, as a little treat.

Trending via YouTube:

Hear me out. What if we don’t elect another president, and we all just promise to be really good?

Just landed via WhatsApp:

I started at the bottom, and it’s been downhill ever since.

Just landed via Reddit:

Can everyone please turn their A/C off during the day, we need that power to generate images of people with eight fingers.

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

Adulting is difficult. One minute you’re proud of yourself, the next minute you feel like you’re not doing enough.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I wonder if people who spend all their time screaming on the internet know there are way more fun things to do.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Dating apps? No thanks, if I wanted to talk to someone for hours and accomplish nothing, I’d contact tech support.

My biggest fear about becoming a zombie is all the walking.

Wife is temporary. Being the hot EX is forever.

Dating someone from Twitter is like believing a stripper loves you.

A beaver is an otter that has studied architecture.

Isn’t it weird we have a little voice in our head, like the one you’re using to read this?

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨