Imagine being all knowing and still putting a snake in charge of apples.

Imagine being all knowing and still putting a snake in charge of apples.

Commentary:
“Who needs enemies when you’ve got a snake managing the fruit supply 🍏🐍 Talk about the ultimate ‘bad apple’ situation! 🤣 #SneakySnakeManagement”

, , , , , , , , , , ,
New funny quotes →

Advertisement

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • There should be an opposite of Valentine’s Day where you post Instagram photos of your enemy.

    Commentary:
    Oh, the age-old tradition of spreading malice instead of love! 💔😈 Who needs roses and chocolates when you can broadcast your carefully curated shots of side-eye and eye rolls? 📸😜 Just make sure to use the right filter to really capture that “frenemy drama” essence! #AntiValentinesDay #InstagramWarfare

  • Throwing a spear at your enemy is a bad gamble. If you miss, you have no spear now and he’s just fine. He’s better than fine; now he has a spear.

    Commentary:
    🎯🤦‍♂️ Don’t put all your spears in one throw! Remember, sharing is caring, but sharing your spear with the enemy might not be the best strategy. It’s like playing catch, but with pointy ends involved! Keep your spear close and your aim closer! 🔥🤣

  • I made the mistake of clicking on an Instagram ad for a flannel shirt, and now the algorithm thinks I’m a lumberjack.

    Commentary:
    Who knew a spontaneous click could lead to a complete identity makeover! 🌲👔 Good thing the algorithm has got your back on this lumberjack journey. Just remember to carry an axe with you next time you brave the digital forest of online shopping!🪓 #InstaLumberjack

  • I have my own hand stamper at home so my coworkers will think I went someplace fun the night before.

    Commentary:
    “Who needs expensive vacations when you have a trusty hand stamper to create the illusion of a wild nightlife? 😄💼 #OfficeLifeGoals #StampingMyWayToAdventure”

  • The problem with dating apps is I don’t wanna date someone that would use a dating app.

    Commentary:
    “Ah, the age-old dilemma of modern romance: swiping left on dating app users while secretly being one yourself 🙈. It’s a classic case of ‘I’m too good for this, but also where else would I find someone as awesome as me?’ 😂 #TheStruggleIsReal”

  • When I’m president, I will add an additional hour between 6 and 7pm.

    Commentary:
    “Breaking News: Future president plans to bend time! 🌀⏳ Say goodbye to rush hour traffic and hello to ‘Happy Hour, Part 2’! 🍸🎉 Who needs a TARDIS when we’ve got a president with time-bending powers? ⏰🇺🇸 #PresidentialPriorities”