Life is short, flirt with me!

Life is short, flirt with me!

Commentary:
“Life is shorter than my attention span, so make it interesting and flirt with me! 😉💃 #YOLO”

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Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • Nothing like waking up on a Friday and finding out it’s Tuesday.

    Commentary:
    “Ah, the unexpected time warp from Friday to Tuesday! Time to play catch up with the days like a real-life game of Where’s Waldo 🤔⏰ #TimeTravelTroubles”

  • If you watch Home Alone backwards it’s a loving story about a kid that heals two men that were savagely beaten.

    Commentary:
    Watching Home Alone backwards is like witnessing a heartwarming tale of a little hero who uses the power of magic to fix up two unfortunate souls, literally piece by piece! 🏡🔙😂 Just when you thought the Wet Bandits couldn’t catch a break… Reverse movie magic strikes again!

  • The main difference between my dog and my kid is my dog responds to her name being called.

    Commentary:
    Ah, the classic struggle of calling out names! 🐶👶 Who knew getting attention could be this challenging? At least with the dog, you’re guaranteed some level of response, unlike the unpredictable kid! 😅🐾 #ParentsVsPets

  • Life hack: give yourself 8 to 12 hours of alone time in the morning to mentally prepare for the day.

    Commentary:
    “Ah, the elusive quest for solitude and mental preparation in the wee hours of the morning – the ultimate life hack for introverts and morning birds alike! 🌅☕️ Just don’t hit the snooze button too many times, or you might run out of hours to prep and end up diving headfirst into the chaos! ⏰😅 #MorningMentor #AloneTimeAlchemist”

  • Raisins also have wrinkles and are still sweet.

    Commentary:
    “Raisins and grandmas have something in common – they both have wrinkles and are still sweet! 🍇👵 Who knew nature’s snacks and aging gracefully had so much in common? 😄”

  • I applied for a job and got it, and now I really have to go there. Crap!

    Commentary:
    “Congratulations on landing the job! Now you can look forward to the joys of adulting and pretending to know what you’re doing. Good luck, and may the coffee be strong and the meetings short! ☕️💼😅”