Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇳 has bookmarked:

Workplace Wrapped: you had 60k minutes of meetings this year that could’ve been an email.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has copied:

My ability to remember song lyrics from the ’90s far exceeds my ability to remember why I walked into the garage.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has shared:

I regret to inform you that we must all once again figure out what to make for dinner tonight.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has viewed:

People who sound like fonts: Ariana Grande. Roman Roy. Jim Courier. Lydia West. Bon Iver. Suella Braverman. Jesse Ventura.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has copied:

Fifty shades of I miss you.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has bookmarked:

Sometimes, I feel like my brain is still running on Windows 95.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has downloaded:

Feeling melancholy. Think I’ll have a drink and make things much worse.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has copied:

I am not the person I thought I was when I cut that donut in half.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has bookmarked:

My big 3? Yapping, napping & snacking!

Someone from 🇾🇪 has copied:

They should make a tanning bed that constantly rolls you over like a gas station hotdog.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,549

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via TikTok:

When I hear the word “horror”, the first thing I think of is bills, not Halloween.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

I keep all my valuables near the front door so if burglars breaks in during the night they will not wake me up.

Making waves on Facebook:

In your 20s, you’ll meet a short man. It’s very important you jump over him.

Shared recently on Twitch:

Adult friendships are like, “hey girl, let’s keep rescheduling to hangout until one of us dies.”

Going bananas on X:

We should thank heaven for nipples. Without them boobs would be pointless.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

Why would I date a nonchalant man? I like my men how I like my thong.

Spotted on Pinterest:

Before I started my own business, I would suffer from anxiety on Sunday nights. But now that I run my own business, I have anxiety every night.

Spotted on WeChat:

I wish that reading books in the park were my job, and I got paid six figures for it.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

You know the trouble with real life? There’s no danger music.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

People on Facebook be like “can anyone tell me about a thing I can easily Google myself?”

Thank you, God, for another day. Let’s get this 12-hour screen time.

4 weeks ago

Funny Quotes

Playful quote about gratitude and humorously embracing a long day of screen time.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Praying to the Wi-Fi gods for strong signals today! 📱🙏😂

another, daily, daily routine, day, God, gratitude, humor, routine, screen, screen time, technology, thank, thank you, time

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Wake me up when I’m rich!

2 weeks ago

ambition, dream, humor, me, money, rich, sleep, wake
Hyphenated. Non-hyphenated. The irony.

2 weeks ago

grammar, humor, hyphenated, irony, language, non-hyphenated
Gonorrhea would’ve been a great name for diarrhea medicine.

2 weeks ago

diarrhea, funny name, gonorrhea, great, humor, joke, medicine, name, wordplay
The sluttiest thing a man can do is have an ethical dilemma over his lust for you.

2 weeks ago

attraction, dating, dilemma, ethics, flirtation, humor, humor quote, lust, man, morality, over, relationships, romantic, romantic dilemma, thing
I made you something special for Mother’s Day, my kid threatened.

2 weeks ago

day, family, gift, humor, i, joke, kid, mother’s, Mother’s Day, parenting, something, special, threat
We should be able take jets and tanks and stuff whenever we want, we paid for them.

3 weeks ago

absurdity, entitlement, humor, jets, military, paid, payment, satire, should, stuff, take, tanks, want, whenever

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

46 shares on WeChat this month:

My workout is reading in bed until my arms hurt.

47 shares on YouTube this month:

The adult version of “head, shoulders, knees and toes” is “wallet, glasses, keys and phone.”

78 shares on Reddit this month:

Shout out to people jogging in this heat, no, seriously, shout out to make sure they’re okay.

76 shares on X this month:

Alexa, turn off the planet.

33 shares on Facebook this month:

Home: Where I can look ugly and not care.

98 shares on Discord this month:

It’s messed up how us humans have to obey all these laws while bears get to eat whoever they want.

24 shares on Reddit this month:

What do you even say when someone knocks on your bathroom stall … like, what’s the protocol?

83 shares on Reddit this month:

Those eyes ain’t gonna roll itself, let me help you.

74 shares on Snapchat this month:

There’s a certain nothing about you.

57 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Single by choice. Just not my choice.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇲 has copied:

If humanity is so smart, how come it took thousands of years after the wheel was invented for someone to put them on a suitcase?

Someone from 🇲🇷 has shared:

Stupidity begins where irony is no longer understood.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has bookmarked:

Every marriage has a personality hire, and then someone who knows how insurance works.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has downloaded:

How many cups of coffee is OK to have every day? Is it eight? I’m pretty sure it’s eight.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has bookmarked:

How do you know I’m not just a figment of your imagination?

Someone from 🇱🇾 has copied:

Don’t worry. There is still hope for the summer: the rain should get warmer soon.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has downloaded:

I heard a mouse yesterday. So now I loudly announce myself whenever I enter a dark room. In case you’re wondering how brave I am.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has bookmarked:

No open job postings for “Warrior Poet” found in your area. Please try another search.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has viewed:

Bloopers in movie credits is a lost art form.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has shared:

There are days when trying to control your class is like trying to hug a tornado.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Telegram:

The thing I bought on Etsy in 2017 has shipped.

Live now on LinkedIn:

I don’t wanna brag, but I’ve been told I’m micro-management material.

Making waves on Snapchat:

Whenever I get up my cat gets up too and then yells at me like it’s my fault she decided we have to do this together.

Seen just now on Instagram:

The art of letting whoever think whatever.

Just shared via Telegram:

Tall people make me nervous. What the hell are you doing up there? Stop eating the leaves off that tree.

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

Peer pressure has nothing on me; all my bad decisions are made single-handedly.

Spotted on Messenger:

This coffee isn’t working. Think I need holy water.

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

How soon into a new relationship should you let her know you’re an idiot?

Trending via Twitch:

Skinny people are easier to get blown around by storms. These donuts are for my safety.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

The more nicknames I have for you, the more I like you.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Thank you, God, for another day. Let’s get this 12-hour screen time.

Keep the laugh going 😂

Wake me up when I’m rich!

Hyphenated. Non-hyphenated. The irony.

Gonorrhea would’ve been a great name for diarrhea medicine.

The sluttiest thing a man can do is have an ethical dilemma over his lust for you.

I made you something special for Mother’s Day, my kid threatened.

We should be able take jets and tanks and stuff whenever we want, we paid for them.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨