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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇦 has bookmarked:

I’m officially at the age where I’m not upgrading my phone until it stops working.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has shared:

I will never fall victim to groupthink. I have perfectly unique opinions that no one else has, and they are the dumbest nonsense you’ve ever heard.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has copied:

Apparently, everyone on the Zoom calls outside my office finds my singing distracting.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has viewed:

Don’t talk to me unless you are a ham sandwich.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has shared:

Work is the worst video game ever.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has downloaded:

Summer is here. Always put on some suncream to help the rain run off.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has viewed:

Heard a recording of my own voice, and now I can never speak again.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has viewed:

Need a permanent vacuum for unwanted thoughts.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has downloaded:

Me: “I’m still young.” My bones: “No, we not.”

Someone from 🇧🇼 has bookmarked:

My morning routine includes 20 minutes of staring at the ceiling thinking about how tired I am and debating if I really need to live today.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

729 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,891

Funny Quotes Topics

13,867

Funny Quotes Images

10,891

43 minutes ago

3,434

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Messenger:

Everyone thinks they will be the first person in history to maintain their dignity while posting online.

Breaking via Reddit:

Yes, hello, I’d like to exchange my generational trauma for generational wealth, please.

Just shared via Threads:

It’s kinda weird that in order to go to sleep you have to pretend like you are already sleeping.

Reported on Telegram:

The goal is never Gucci bags. It’s acres of land.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

Shoutout to the friends that still like me. All two of you.

Spotted on Twitch:

I aspire to be a stay-at-home mom with no kids.

Broadcasted on WeChat:

When this multivitamin kicks in I’m going to do so much success.

Trending via YouTube:

Called in, “I put the lime in the coconut and drank it all up.”

Just shared via Instagram:

I just want peace, not a notification every time someone breathes.

Broadcasted on Telegram:

In a previous life I may have been a carrier pigeon, in that all I ever think about is going home.

Home » Funny Daily Quotes

116 Funny daily quotes

Funny daily quotes shine a light on the hilarious routines, mishaps, and mini-meltdowns we experience every single day! 😂📆 Whether it’s struggling to get out of bed, pretending coffee is a personality, or wondering how it’s only Tuesday, these quotes remind us that the daily grind is full of comedy gold. Because let’s face it — if we don’t laugh at our daily chaos, who will? 😆☕🌀

New funny daily quotes 👇

3 days ago
Share →: Every day, a new coworker asks if you’ve used ChatGPT, and the conversation doesn’t end if you say “No.”

Commentary:
Sure, here's a funny comment for you:

When you say "No," buckle up because you're about to get the deluxe tour of AI magic and non-stop marveling! 😂🤖✨
3 days ago
Share →: When you have the money, you can go a whole day without eating. But when you’re broke, the dizziness starts at 6 a.m.

Commentary:
Starting the day with a side of dizziness and a sprinkle of existential dread, served fresh at sunrise! 🍽️🤪💸
4 days ago
Share →: You ask a girl if she ate, and she gon say, “Yeah, I had my coffee.”

Commentary:
When did coffee become a food group? ☕️🍽️😄
4 days ago
Share →: Teens be like, “This is the worst day of my life,” and it’s just that they were told to unload the dishwasher.

Commentary:
When your entire world falls apart because the dishes need rescuing from the dishwasher 😂🍽️🙄
4 days ago
Share →: I birthed my kid faster than she can put on shoes.

Commentary:
Sounds like your kid graduated from the School of Slow Shoelace Tying! 🐢👟😄
5 days ago
Share →: Expecting your first baby’s exciting, but have you ever ordered a new coffee machine?

Commentary:
Looks like coffee machines and babies both come with their own set of sleepless nights and surprises! ☕👶🤣
5 days ago
Share →: Every day, I go to work and draw a little tick on everyone who didn’t say goodbye to me the day before.

Commentary:
That level of commitment deserves a tick of approval… or maybe a sticky note reminder! 😂📋🖊️
5 days ago
Share →: Working out consistently yields results, but mannnnnnn…… the laundry.

Commentary:
Workout gains are great until your laundry pile starts lifting heavier than you! 🏋️‍♂️👕🥴
6 days ago
Share →: 89% of the time when my husband tells me I look great, what he really means is, “We needed to leave five minutes ago.”

Commentary:
🚀😂 "When 'You look great!' becomes the new 'We're late!', fashionably running behind has never felt more glamorous! ⏰👠"
6 days ago
Share →: “What fresh hell is this?“ It’s actually the same hell as yesterday. Not fresh at all, really.

Commentary:
Guess we're in a Hell Groundhog Day! Where's Bill Murray when you need him? 🔄🔥😅

For even more funny daily quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny daily quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

729 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,891

Funny Quotes Topics

13,867

Funny Quotes Images

10,891

43 minutes ago

3,417

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇻 has shared:

Eating the sticker on an apple counts as 35% of your daily fiber intake.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has viewed:

The key to happiness: 1/ order a pizza. 2/ eat that pizza. 3/ repeat!

Someone from 🇨🇭 has bookmarked:

Not to brag, but I can put my socks on without sitting down.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has shared:

I’m so single. When they ask me for an emergency contact, I put the neighbor’s dog.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has bookmarked:

Every gift guide for men is like “A flannel flask to hold your knife flavored whiskey.”

Someone from 🇰🇿 has shared:

Being a woman is hard. You always want to buy something, slap someone, lose weight and eat something sweet.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has shared:

The tag on my jeans says “Relaxed” so it obviously doesn’t have children.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has bookmarked:

The second half of your life begins when you stop wanting to get even and start wanting to get odd.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has shared:

There’s someone in our team who behaves horribly to me and whenever I have to type his name, I’ve taken to using a slightly smaller font size than for everyone else’s.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has shared:

Welcome to your 40s—you run out of breath trying to find your running shoes.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

I have tasted employment, I have tasted joblessness and I recommend generational wealth guys.

Breaking via Facebook:

Іf Empire Strikes Back isn’t a Christmas movie, then why is there so much snow in it?

Making waves on Facebook:

It used be called “talking to yourself” but the new term for it is “podcasting”.

Shared recently on Facebook:

Alexa, turn off the planet.

Seen just now on Messenger:

Marry someone the same size as you to avoid decades of annoyance adjusting the seats and mirrors in the car.

Shared recently on Discord:

Having a cat is like having a roommate that doesn’t want to hang out and never intends on being friends.

Going viral on YouTube:

Did it make you feel powerful when you didn’t let me merge onto the highway?

Just landed via Telegram:

I wish we were cats so you could just randomly slap co-workers for no reason.

Making waves on TikTok:

People complain about jury duty as if listening to true crime all day and being sequestered at night isn’t secretly every mother’s fantasy.

Trending via Messenger:

Good news: I set an all time high today! Bad news: It’s my cholesterol.

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