Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • Nobody victim blames more than my oldest son when he’s in trouble for punching his little brother.
  • I’ve never been cut in half by a magician, but I have worn jeans on Thanksgiving. Same thing.
  • I like to listen to the national anthems during the award ceremonies. I’m into country music.
  • Waking up has backfired on me so many times.
  • Anytime a guy says “that’s what she said” always reply with “yeah, but not to you”.
  • There should be a day between Sunday and Monday called Hang on a Second.