Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇯🇵 has shared:

Why can’t my fat leave me like everything else does?

Someone from 🇫🇲 has bookmarked:

When your electric toothbrush dies, it becomes a regular toothbrush. Don’t freak out. Just calm down and remember your training.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has copied:

The way my phone’s facial recognition pretends not to recognize me, you’d think I dated it.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has bookmarked:

Grab your own butt! Love yourself!

Someone from 🇵🇹 has downloaded:

It feels like a million o’clock right now.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has shared:

Age is just a number… that now takes a really long time to scroll to.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has bookmarked:

A person’s character can be read quite reliably from the way he or she interacts with service personnel.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has viewed:

I googled my symptoms and it turns out I just need this election to be over.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has shared:

Let’s lay on the couch together, play on our phones, and ignore each other, babe.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has downloaded:

“At your big age” is one of my favorite insults.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Feb 3, 2026

3,457

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Messenger:

76% of pardoned turkeys end up back in the system.

Trending via Messenger:

The food hits different when it ain’t yours.

Breaking via Threads:

Me to alien: I, too, try to live among people undetected.

Making waves on Discord:

Not my room, not my elephant.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

In America we have marijuana. In France they have oui’d.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

Nothing ruins your weekend faster than remembering Monday is lurking in the shadows.

Trending via Pinterest:

I was so locked in, to the point where we were tongue-kissing with morning breath.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

I used to be a night owl, but as I’ve gotten older, I’ve become more of a person who doesn’t function at any time.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

Stop checking your phone every minute. No one loves you.

Breaking via YouTube:

I put my bathroom scale in the corner, and that’s where the little liar will stay until it apologizes.

The police sent me a photo radar ticket so I sent them a photo of a hundred dollars, so I guess we’re even.

2 weeks ago

Clever humorous text about exchanging money for a photo radar ticket.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Looks like someone found a creative way to settle the score with the police! 📸💸 Nothing beats a clever response to a photo radar ticket, turning the tables in style! Next time, maybe they'll try accepting payment in witty retorts instead! 😂 #TicketPaidInStyle

dollars, even, guess, humor, i, joke, me, money, photo, police, radar, ticket

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Funny Quotes Collections

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Social Media Stars ⭐

43 shares on Telegram this month:

Got a scam email full of mistakes like they’re not even trying. It won’t be long before AI takes their jobs.

37 shares on YouTube this month:

Remember when we used to jump out of the swings? Those knees were fresh, fresh out the box.

78 shares on Pinterest this month:

It’s Friday. Rules don’t apply.

58 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Putting together a piece of furniture today, so my kids are about to learn swear words that haven’t even been invented yet.

84 shares on YouTube this month:

“You’re a flirt!” God forbid a girl has good communication skills.

65 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Sharing wired earphones is a forgotten form of intimacy.

35 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Should I ever be mean and insulting, then it comes from the bottom of my heart.

41 shares on Reddit this month:

“I’m depressed because there’s not enough cheese in this world to satisfy my hunger for it.”

66 shares on YouTube this month:

Somewhere there’s a girl ignoring 15 guys for a guy who gives her no attention.

18 shares on Messenger this month:

Noise-canceling headphones aren’t enough, I need everyone to shut up.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

21 folks are currently checking 👀

So apparently if they ask “do you trust me?”, replying with “well, I trust you to be you” is the incorrect response.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Tupperware is a fun way to store your leftovers until you throw them away.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Honestly, how women are drawn in a manga is typically (though not always) a good clue for what demographic a manga series is.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

My brain at 2 a.m.: “You up?”

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Instagram should let you extend the run of one story for another 24 hours if the intended target didn’t see it.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Super excited about a brand new week of self-sabotage.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

The only thing that has grown faster than rents in recent years is the overtime we have to work to pay them.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

If someone drunk texts you, appreciate it. They’ve thought of you when they can barely think straight.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Dogs naturally form packs, and if left undisturbed, will teach themselves how to play poker.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

“There are no words in the English language that have all the vowels in alphabetical order,” he said facetiously.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,302

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇻🇨 has copied:

Winter hack: Avoid the cold by never leaving your house.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has shared:

I don’t know when people started calling hot dogs ‘glizzys,’ but I hate it, and you all need to stop immediately.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has downloaded:

I could be a masseuse, or I could just be pulling your leg.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has downloaded:

Telling the cop I’ll give him his nose back if he lowers his firearm.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has bookmarked:

Slim Shady implies the existence of Thicc Sunny.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has shared:

Parents be like “don’t believe everything you see on the internet” then believe everything they see on Facebook.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has downloaded:

According to my chocolate advent calendar, there are only 4 days until Christmas.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has copied:

I’m letting go of all earthly attachment — exactly like Buddha, except for the things I like and want.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has copied:

I have a condition that prevents me from dieting. It’s called being hungry.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has shared:

Might start a YouTube channel “will it hurt if I drop it on my foot”.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Messenger:

There’s no sadder tableau in all of humanity than the smoker’s terrarium at the airport.

Just shared via Telegram:

They should make the last foot of dental floss red so you know when you’re about to run out.

Going viral on Slack:

My mind not only wanders, sometimes it leaves completely!

Seen just now on Twitch:

Hey, I came over because the grass seemed really green here, but now that I’m looking back that grass actually looks crazy green, so I’m gonna go.

Going viral on Instagram:

If there are parallel realities, I really hope they’re not as stupid as this one.

Trending via Twitch:

My rock bottom keeps refreshing.

Trending via X:

So grateful for pillows. My head works hard, it deserves its own bed.

Broadcasted on YouTube:

Don’t be coming into my house and causing big spikes of cortisol.

Just shared via Slack:

We all have that one coworker whose sole purpose is to reduce our life expectancy by ten years.

Live now on Reddit:

Okay, I’ve proved I’m not a robot, now you prove you’re not a human.

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