Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇭 has shared:

I only have one wish in life… For all my dreams to come true.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has bookmarked:

A chocolate advent calendar is a test of restraint that I simply do not have.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has downloaded:

Driving is great because it combines my love of sitting with my love of being mad.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has downloaded:

At the grocery store, progressively booing louder as the clerk scans each item.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has shared:

Life is just resetting your password until you die.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has viewed:

That moment when you realize “yeah, this person is never gonna hear from me again” is so crazy.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has viewed:

Couldn’t afford a man cave. Had to settle for a gazebro.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has viewed:

You’re in her DMs. I’m accidentally reposting reels of Tibetan foxes because I don’t know how to use the app anymore.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has shared:

Who called it asking the waiter about the specials and not retrieving data from the server?

Someone from 🇨🇱 has shared:

I be skipping everyone’s stories but watch mine like 20 times.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

531 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,124

Funny Quotes Topics

17,272

Funny Quotes Images

15,124

Updated

Dec 27, 2025

Users Online

4,015

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Facebook:

Please don’t ask me what my hobbies are, I lost interest in life back in 6th grade.

Broadcasted on WeChat:

I thought I liked seeing movies, but it turns out I like eating candy in a dark room where it’s illegal to talk to me.

Just shared via TikTok:

Imagine hating on me and I’m just sitting there in the corner, in the spotlight, losing my religion.

Going viral on Telegram:

Having a horse run off on you in medieval times must have been crazy. Imagine if your car got scared and ran away, and you found it a day later by itself at a gas station.

Just landed via Messenger:

Doctors don’t really need to hit you with that rubber hammer, it’s just how they release a lil tension through the day.

Shared recently on Messenger:

“Thanks for your payment!” Shut up. I paid that bill against my will.

Going bananas on Pinterest:

Men used to build castles for women they love, but now they think replying on time is too much effort.

Broadcasted on Messenger:

I’m basically the human version of tangled up Christmas lights.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

A lot of y’all don’t understand politics because your history teacher was the football coach.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Turns out, college is all about forming unspoken, powerful bonds with people you talk to twice.

Why insult someone when you can say something nice in a very sarcastic tone?

0
Why insult someone when you can say something nice in a very sarcastic tone?
Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Who needs insults when you can sprinkle a little sweetness on top of pure sarcasm? 🍬😏 It's like giving a backhanded compliment wrapped in a warm hug. 😜😇 Let's keep 'em guessing with our perfectly blended sincerity and sarcasm – the ultimate playful combo! 🤭💁‍♂️"

, , , , , , , , , ,

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

55 shares on Facebook this month:

Life tip: If all of your bathrooms are full and you’re waiting for someone to finish, just turn off the WiFi in the house.

87 shares on Threads this month:

My therapist said this to me, and it hit me like a brick: “They’re not your friends if they disagree with you or try to challenge you.”

69 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I have never seen an alcohol company using a drunk person for any advertising, are they ashamed of their customers?

92 shares on Reddit this month:

I wanna marry someone funnier than me, but sadly, I am the funniest.

27 shares on Messenger this month:

If I’m not back in five minutes, just wait longer.

36 shares on WeChat this month:

No, I’m not “dating anyone.” I’m really busy playing outside.

23 shares on Twitch this month:

You think you’re aging well and then you feel an earlobe hair blowing in the wind.

61 shares on Facebook this month:

Establish dominance by showing up with all your childhood trophies.

98 shares on X this month:

Thursday is really unnecessary. Today could’ve been Friday.

61 shares on Slack this month:

Nobody cleans better than somebody that’s pissed off.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Having a peanut allergy has to be so wild. Like, imagine you’re at a baseball game and there are people chucking bags of rattlesnakes past your head.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Having a horse run off on you in medieval times must have been crazy. Imagine if your car got scared and ran away, and you found it a day later by itself at a gas station.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

My kid is turning out just like me. Well played, karma. Well-played.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Why is bacon called bacon and cookies called cookies if you cook bacon and bake cookies?

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Pro tip: Avoid the news for a couple of days and have some fun.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

If you tell me to watch until the end, the end better be in five seconds.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Thank God for headphones and day dreaming.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Sorry, boss, I can’t come in to work today, I’m gonna be playing outside.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

I think I’ll spend my savings on a lifetime supply of pasta. Worth every penne.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

“Is this a joke to you?” Unfortunately, everything is a little bit of a joke to me.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

531 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,124

Funny Quotes Topics

17,272

Funny Quotes Images

15,124

Updated

Dec 27, 2025

Users Online

3,949

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇲 has copied:

Alexa, tell Roomba to get the spider.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has shared:

The art of staying somewhat sane in an insane world.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has shared:

Just thinking how many animals we had to ride on before we realized horses were ok with it.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has bookmarked:

Gosh, being a princess is exhausting.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has viewed:

Sorry, can’t. I’m too busy growing new neural pathways to make space for a stranger’s opinion. Evolution takes bandwidth, man.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has shared:

“What’s your music taste?” Don’t know, man. If it sounds good, I’m adding it to the playlist.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has bookmarked:

When I’m president, I will add an additional hour between 6 and 7pm.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has downloaded:

Your favorite little ball of silliness has logged in.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has copied:

If you occasionally blow on your bourbon during a Zoom meeting, the other folks will think you’re enjoying a hot cup of tea.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has downloaded:

I’m not moody; I’m just on shuffle.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via YouTube:

Being flirted with while you’re on the clock feels like a hostage situation.

Spotted on X:

A fitness trainer showed me the proper way to inhale and exhale and then got pissed when I told her she had nice breaths.

Going bananas on Instagram:

I get at least 1,000 steps in waiting for my food to be done in the microwave.

Spotted on TikTok:

Sex is great, but have you ever had your alarm go off and then realize you don’t have to get up today?

Spreading quickly via LinkedIn:

Eight times a day, I ask myself which object in the office will hurt me enough so that I can go home, but at the same time won’t hurt too much.

Spotted on Messenger:

My wife almost fell down the stairs today and that got us into a heated argument whether my gasp was out of concern or excitement.

Just landed via Discord:

So many people to disappoint, so little time.

Trending via Pinterest:

The phrase “don’t take this the wrong way” has a 0% success rate.

Going viral on TikTok:

Getting stoned when you have a cat is awesome because it will just walk in and I’m immediately cracking up. Like, look at this dude, I bloody love this guy.

Just shared via Pinterest:

Driving to work, and I just reached down to touch my leg to make sure I have pants on.

© 2025. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴