Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇬 has viewed:

Well, that’s not very in love with me of you.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has viewed:

My signature move is to tell men that I can’t hear them because I have my headphones in when I quite visibly don’t have headphones in.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has shared:

As a woman, you need to forgive yourself for men you entertained when you had low self-esteem.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has bookmarked:

I love it when God gives me money.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has downloaded:

All these microplastics in me could at least do some repair work to my knees and back while they’re in there.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has copied:

Nothing ruins a Friday like realizing it’s only Wednesday.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has copied:

About to form my very first opinion.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has viewed:

Your fingers have fingertips, but your toes don’t have toetips. Yet, you can tiptoe but not tipfinger.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has viewed:

Heyyyyyy (with the worst of intentions).

Someone from 🇨🇾 has downloaded:

I love when people start getting filler, and instead of looking younger, it’s just like okay, your face is getting really, really big in all directions.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

243 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,512

Funny Quotes Topics

17,578

Funny Quotes Images

15,512

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,563

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Facebook:

My brain says “Let’s do something exciting today” but my body says “Don’t listen to that fool.”

Just landed via TikTok:

Sorry I’m late, my dog was sleeping in the shape of a donut and I had to take so many photos.

Trending via Pinterest:

I will charge a 25% tariff on my steely gaze.

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

The best way to enjoy your tea while the world is falling apart around you is to remember that the world has always been falling apart around you.

Going bananas on YouTube:

Why do they call it rush hour when nothing moves?

Live now on Snapchat:

Ok, hear me out: a reality show where billionaire CEOs have to live off of their lowest-paid employees’ salaries for a month.

Going viral on Twitch:

Not to brag, but I’ve seen Barbie naked.

Shared recently on Twitch:

A pet resting their little paw on you is a sign of respect in their culture.

Making waves on Instagram:

At some point in life, you graduate from Family Guy to American Dad.

Just shared via Facebook:

Whoever has my voodoo doll, please make it study.

A beautiful woman should never have to send an email. Yet, such tragedies occur every day.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Every email she sends is a crime against beauty! 🥺💌 #JusticeForBeauties"

beautiful, beauty, day, email, every, humor, never, send, should, social, technology, tragedy, woman

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

My last straw is way longer than I thought.

0

2 months ago

expectation, frustration, humor, last, limit, patience, perspective, straw, surprise, thought
Camping? No, thank you. If I wanted to sleep outside, I wouldn’t pay my mortgage.

0

2 months ago

activity, camping, comfort, home, humor, i, mortgage, outdoor, outdoor activity, outside, pay, sleep, thank, wanted
Imagine hating on me and I’m just sitting there in the corner, in the spotlight, losing my religion.

0

2 months ago

corner, hatred, imagine, just, losing, me, religion, sitting, spotlight
I tried meowing back at the cat to show him I was making an effort, but he just switched to English.

0

2 months ago

animal, animal communication, back, barrier, cat, cats, communication, effort, English, humor, i, joke, just, language, language barrier, language joke, making, meowing, quirky, show, tried
Sometimes I read a text and think, “What a psycho.” And then I press send.

0

2 months ago

communication, digital, humor, i, impulsive, media, messaging, press, psycho, reaction, read, send, social, social media, sometimes, text, think
Shoutout to video games, man. I love having a reason to live.

0

3 weeks ago

game, games, gaming, having, humor, i, live, love, man, reason, reason to live, shoutout, video, video game

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

66 shares on Facebook this month:

“Real Housewives” is a great oxymoron because nothing about them is real.

37 shares on Threads this month:

Watched a movie on Netflix last night that was so bad, I walked out of my own house.

22 shares on X this month:

I love doing research. I will look up some stuff in a minute.

59 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Dear Santa, Money!

100 shares on Snapchat this month:

“Gen Z is having less sex.” It’s always sex, sex, sex with these people.

99 shares on Discord this month:

Cats have 32 muscles in each ear, to help them ignore you.

60 shares on Snapchat this month:

I’ve been asked to join a swingers club, but I’m a little nervous. What if I’m not good enough? I haven’t been on a swing since I was 9.

78 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Why does it take 5-7 business days to refund my money when it took 5-7 seconds to take it out of my account?

33 shares on Facebook this month:

The only ‘survival horror’ game I play is called ‘getting up every day and leaving the house.

98 shares on YouTube this month:

Everyone says “Do what makes you happy”, until you push them down the stairs.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇦 has viewed:

I’m just so lazy because I’m still recovering from the fact that I used to be the fastest sperm.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has downloaded:

Whoever removed the 30th and 31st from February, come get the 14th too.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has bookmarked:

“Never let someone else destroy your stuff when you can destroy it yourself”, every kid I ever.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has bookmarked:

Sorry, can’t. I’m currently nodding in class so the teacher doesn’t feel sad.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has copied:

My toxic trait is when I’m bored, I start looking for flights to book.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has downloaded:

Going to work has backfired on me so many times.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has copied:

Bugs have so many legs to make up for their lack of personality.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has shared:

Commenting “This could be us” on her pics with her boyfriend.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has downloaded:

Concert tickets should be 75% off if the artist is really super special to you.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has shared:

Underrated life skill: only doing what feels genuinely right and letting everything else go.

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on WeChat:

If you love something, set it free. If it comes back to you, then you love a boomerang.

Spreading quickly via Discord:

Your dog immediately knows you’re leaving when you put on nice clothes… only because you usually look homeless when you’re at home.

Spotted on WeChat:

My IQ used to be higher than my weight, but now I’m fat and dumb.

Spotted on Discord:

My cold is worse than yours because it’s happening to me.

Going bananas on Telegram:

I am both dumber and smarter than you think. Do not estimate me.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

Have kids so you can live in a house full of people who can’t find anything.

Broadcasted on YouTube:

I was so excited thinking tomorrow was Friday only to find out it is definitely not Friday.

Just shared via Pinterest:

I could have been the favorite mistress of the Sun King at Versailles, but nooooooooo I had to be born into late stage capitalism.

Going bananas on LinkedIn:

Getting tired without doing anything is an art form.

Breaking via Twitch:

There’s nothing scarier than sneezing with a full cup of coffee in your hand.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

A beautiful woman should never have to send an email. Yet, such tragedies occur every day.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

My last straw is way longer than I thought.

Camping? No, thank you. If I wanted to sleep outside, I wouldn’t pay my mortgage.

Imagine hating on me and I’m just sitting there in the corner, in the spotlight, losing my religion.

I tried meowing back at the cat to show him I was making an effort, but he just switched to English.

Sometimes I read a text and think, “What a psycho.” And then I press send.

Shoutout to video games, man. I love having a reason to live.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨