Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇷 has bookmarked:

I bought a bag of M&M’s and they don’t have M’s anymore. They all have W’s, for woke.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has viewed:

Slow blinking at my boss so he knows I want a raise.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has bookmarked:

I prefer people who actually know what’s going on.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has copied:

I was going to go for a run, then realized I could just run my mouth on here.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has shared:

“Don’t judge a book by its cover” is a beautiful, powerful sentiment that I fully ignore when book shopping.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has copied:

I wish pets lived longer, and life wasn’t so expensive, and cake didn’t make you fat, and people weren’t twats.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has copied:

So my wife goes, “It’s not you — it’s me.” Obviously written by ChatGPT.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has shared:

You can tell it’s laundry day because I’m wearing flippers and a Viking helmet.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has bookmarked:

After overthinking about it for 6 hours, I have decided that it’s actually not that big of a deal.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has shared:

Carefully choosing which wine to pair with a McRib.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 19, 2026

Users Online

3,450

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Threads:

Went to the gym two days in a row. This is a fitness account now.

Going bananas on Pinterest:

“Work smarter, not harder.” Brother, I’m not doing either of those things.

Spotted on Slack:

I used to sell furniture for a living. The trouble was, it was my own.

Trending via WhatsApp:

Insomnia sharpens your math skills because you spend all night calculating how much sleep you’ll get if you’re able to ‘fall asleep right now.’

Broadcasted on Messenger:

I’ve already sent Santa a short letter this week to say hello. Not that he thinks I only get in touch if I want something.

Making waves on TikTok:

When I grow up, I’d like to be a retired lottery winner.

Trending via Threads:

Not to brag, but no one has ever accused me of trying too hard.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Being informed is the worst thing I’ve ever done for my mental health.

Spotted on Threads:

I’m not good at quickly making up derogatory names on the fly, unless I’m driving.

Freshly posted on X:

Santa punched a hole in my wall because I left him soy milk.

82 Funny attraction quotes

Funny attraction quotes 😂 are your go-to source for a good laugh while navigating the wild world of romance ❤️. Whether you’re looking to spice up your dating profile or lighten the mood with your crush, these witty one-liners and clever observations about love are sure to entertain 🎉. Perfect for sharing, they bring a playful twist to the ups and downs of attraction, leaving everyone smiling along the way 😄.

New funny attraction quotes 👇

For even more funny attraction quotes, hit next 👇

All funny attraction quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections
✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

83 shares on Twitch this month:

I’m so old that when I take a walk down memory lane, I get lost.

61 shares on Facebook this month:

There’s something fundamentally wrong with the way people interact with each other on LinkedIn.

88 shares on Twitch this month:

Sure sex is cool, but have you ever farted away a stomachache?

93 shares on Facebook this month:

Feeling guilty for taking up the entire therapy session talking about myself.

21 shares on Facebook this month:

If you innocently act like you don’t know, people will explain dirty words to you and it’s hilarious.

47 shares on Reddit this month:

The main difference between my dog and my kid is my dog responds to her name being called.

66 shares on Twitch this month:

If you don’t have anything nice to say, sign up for Twitter.

99 shares on TikTok this month:

I hate how l am a “I have an appointment at 4pm so I can’t do anything all day” type of person.

28 shares on YouTube this month:

‘I have a ripe avocado at home’ is my favorite excuse for cancelling plans.

79 shares on X this month:

Monday? But, I wasn’t even finished with Saturday yet.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Book reviews be like: “5 stars. I’m sobbing. I’m unwell. I haven’t eaten in 16 hours. Highly recommend.”

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Lucky for me, I don’t have enough friends for an intervention.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Having a crush on someone is just having a lack of information on someone.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Working my first office job. Is it normal to have nothing to do?

14 folks are currently checking 👀

I said when I retire, I would travel. I just didn’t expect it to be to the doctors.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

No matter how busy I am, I still find time to waste on Twitter.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Many people mistakenly believe that diamond is the hardest substance on earth, but in reality it is my husband’s stubborn head.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

At 20, I was unstoppable; at 30, I’m just unstartable.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Lowkey wanna fall in love, but Monday to Friday is work, Saturday is laundry, Sunday is mental prep for Monday. The butterflies in my stomach are actually decomposing.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

When people block me, I just assume it’s for my rugged good looks and killer jawline.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 19, 2026

Users Online

3,527

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇪 has shared:

Instead of working on making myself a better person, I am going to purchase a cool new jacket.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has viewed:

The adult version of “head, shoulders, knees and toes” is “wallet, glasses, keys and phone.”

Someone from 🇲🇳 has bookmarked:

I don’t mean to brag, but I put together a puzzle in 1 day and the box said 2-4 years.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has copied:

Breaking news: Suicidal twin kills sister by mistake.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has bookmarked:

Got sent to HR for calling someone a “jellyfish” — just floating around all day, doing absolutely nothing.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has copied:

When they dress up really nice, but all you can think about is the thrill of taking it off.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has viewed:

I read that Miley Cyrus will be starring in a remake of Silence of the Lambs. She’ll be playing Hannibal Montannibal.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has viewed:

Climbing Mount Everest looks super boring and dumb. You just walk uphill, are cold and at the brink of death. No thanks.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has viewed:

My summer body is just my winter body with better lighting.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has shared:

I can relate to the stock market because I am always about to crash at a moment’s notice.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Twitch:

I miss being able to study with complete focus for hours. Now I read one sentence and check my phone to see if penguins have legs or just feet.

Going bananas on LinkedIn:

According to my Spotify Wrapped, I am what got played the most this year.

Going bananas on Snapchat:

Starting conversations with short people by saying “back when I was your height…”

Just landed via WhatsApp:

The secret to my success is everywhere I go I wear a shirt that says STAFF on the back.

Live now on Facebook:

If only my teeth were as white as my legs.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

Lounging under the stars is top-tier therapy.

Live now on Facebook:

When someone yells stop, I don’t know if it’s in the name of love, it’s hammer time, or if I should collaborate and listen.

Just landed via Instagram:

We were never supposed to have this much access to stupid people’s thoughts, beliefs, and opinions.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Be bold, be italic, but never regular.

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

Hiring a mortician to do my makeup while I sleep.

© 2026. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴